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Author: Darkrose (
darkrosetiger)
Fandom: Stargate: Atlantis
Characters: Ronon, Rodney, Teyla, John, Helia, Atlantis
Archive:
sga_flashfic; all others, please ask.
Rating: PG-13
Length: 2, 270 words
Summary: Everyone misses somebody.
Warnings: Spoilers through "The Return (Part 1)"
Disclaimer: None of these people are mine, and I'm not making any money. OMGMGMDUNSUE!
Notes: Well, here it is: my first SGA fic, written for the "Missing Persons" challenge on
sga_flashfic. Copious thanks to
soleta for the beta; thanks also to
telesilla for giving it a read and listening to me think out loud. The title is a line from "Solsbury Hill", by Peter Gabriel.
i. Ronon
He'd expected to miss Sheppard. The man may not have been his Task Master--never that again, because Kell had made what should have been a title of honor into something vile--but Ronon was still mostly a soldier, and John was his commander. And if he was being honest with himself, which he tried to be since the alternative was pointless, he considered Sheppard a friend. Even if Teyla hadn't told him about her conversation with Sheppard on the way to Sateda, he would have known that John felt the same, because as stupid and reckless as it had been, he'd insisted on coming back for him.
He'd been a little more surprised at how much he missed Weir. Most of the time, her insistence on talking through everything gave him a headache. Sometimes the way she looked at him reminded him of Melena, and he had to turn away. But for all that he thought she was naive, she was a good woman.
It was when he first realized that he missed Rodney McKay that Ronon started wondering if he'd finally lost it. There wasn't any one thing; it was just that as the days away from Atlantis turned into weeks, he began to realize how much McKay's acid tongue had become a constant in his life over the past year. He kept turning around, expecting to hear McKay's non-stop grumbling that always seemed to fade into an oddly pleasant background noise.
When he'd first joined Sheppard's team, Ronon couldn't figure out why McKay went on missions. In the field, his collection of health issues made him a liability; Ronon wasn't sure initially whether his scientific gifts were sufficient compensation for the constant whining, the arrogance, and the unending litany of complaints about the weather, the food, the flora and fauna on whatever planet they happened to be on and their prospects for survival. It wasn't until Ronon had been around Atlantis for a while that he realized that McKay really was as smart as he claimed to be. He was condescending and it rankled, but unlike Weir, who tended to be gently patronizing, especially to non-Earthers, McKay treated everyone as though they were stupid. Compared to him nearly everyone was, so Ronon stopped taking it personally. Seven years Running had taught him a lot about building walls, but where he was smooth stone, McKay was a thornbush, which is why he hadn't recognized it right off.
Once he realized that McKay's abrasiveness was a defense, Ronon just smiled when the scientist went on one of his tirades. In a strange way, he began to appreciate them. Even when he didn't understand what McKay was on about, an occasional word here or there would spark, rekindling parts of his brain that had atrophied during his years as a Runner, when he had to put aside everything that wasn't about survival. Sometimes he thought that McKay might actually understand that, if he talked to him, but he'd never felt like there was a good time. Now, with the Atlanteans back on Earth, he'd probably never have the chance to find out.
ii. Rodney
This time, Rodney had his own lab, with everything set up to his specifications. He'd requested four of the best people from other groups. He'd poked at a couple of projects that had real potential. He had an obscene amount of money since he'd had nothing to spend it on for two-and-a-half years. He didn't have Ren faire rejects shooting him in the ass with crossbows, sadistic fascist sociopaths carving up his arm, or a bunch of Goth-wannabe space vampires trying to suck his life out through his chest.
He also didn't have Atlantis, which is why instead of being thrilled at being back on the planet of coffee and chocolate and poutine and the Internet and his cat, he was utterly miserable.
There'd been so much he hadn't gotten around to looking into (as was made obvious when Helia called up that control station he'd had no idea was there), parts of the city to explore still, all sorts of things to do that he might well be missing out on forever. And...he missed the people. John and Carson and Elizabeth were just in Colorado, and Radek was at least on the same planet, but Ronon and Teyla were in another god damned galaxy and if they hadn't been there the stupid Ancients would've still had another couple million light years to go before making it to Earth and it wasn't fair that they'd just given them forty-eight hours to get out and now he was never going to see Teyla again.
He was a little surprised at how much that it hurt, a tightness in his chest that would have made him worry that something had lemon juice in it or that he was having an asthma attack if it didn't happen every single time he thought about her. It made sense when he thought about it, though. She wasn't really his type (although she was kind of blonde, which shouldn't have worked as well with her gorgeous coffee-and-caramel-colored skin that he couldn't help wanting to lick, just a little along her neck). But okay, so she wasn't as smart as he was; there were only a handful of people who were, right? And it's not like she'd had a chance to go to college or anything on Athos. But she was competent and sexy and thoughtful and gorgeous and brave and loyal and beautiful and there was no way she could be interested in him that way, especially not with someone like Sheppard around because guys like him always got the incredible women (or the incredible un-Ascended Ancients, as the case may be) and there was no reason she--Teyla--should ever look twice at a short, pudgy allergic-to-everything nerd who'd probably drop those sticks if he tried to fight with them and then John and Ronon would laugh and he'd be positively mortified....
...and he'd have traded everything he had on Earth right now for the chance to humiliate himself like that if it meant seeing her one more time.
iii. Teyla
Teyla was used to feeling apart from her people. As a child, there had been the Wraith-sense; later, she was their leader and needed to maintain the appearance of impartiality. That was no longer true--since moving from Atlantis to the mainland the Athosians had looked to Halling more and more--but now, she felt stranded, not of Earth, but no longer entirely of Athos.
For the first time, she truly understood what Michael had felt.
It was awkward, and made even worse be the constant attempts of her friends to push her and Ronon together. Only Halling said nothing, and gently distracted them when he thought the teasing and innuendo was going too far. She liked Ronon--loved him, even, but as a sibling, like she loved Carson and Elizabeth and yes, even Rodney.
Not John.
During the first few months after the Tau'ri came to Pegasus, she told herself that it was only friendship. She valued his trust and the rare glimpses of his heart that he shared with her, and she respected him as her commander in battle.
She wasn't certain when she'd fallen in love with him, but she'd known as soon as she realized it that it couldn't happen. While the rest of Atlantis only saw the effectiveness of Sheppard's team, and marvelled at how four wildly different people managed to work together well and get along almost as well--yes, even Rodney--she knew that the team's closeness was a delicate balance that had been hard-won. If she and John became lovers, that balance would be lost. Ronon would see it as a distraction for John in the battle against the Wraith; Rodney would resent her becoming closer to John and claiming what he would consider more than her fair share of John's attention, and John, with his culture's strange ideas about women would try to protect her, even if it interfered with the mission.
So when she left, she touched her forehead to his, and tried not to think about him kissing her and to wonder if he would ever have done that had he been himself. And despite her brave words, she was afraid that she would never see him again as she stood and watched him step through the gate for the last time.
iv. John
It wasn't fair, and John knew it. His new team couldn't help not being his old one. But it still seemed wrong to go through the gate and not have Teyla at his side, always knowing the right thing to say, Rodney, coming up with something that really was brilliant even if he bitched about it the whole time, and Ronon there to watch their backs. They'd all become close enough that half the time, he didn't need to go through the whole thing of explaining himself because they could all keep up without having to use clumsy, awkward words. As he'd told Teyla once, they were his family--which is why he felt a little guilty every time he jerked off in his nearly-empty apartment and thought of Ronon.
It was inappropriate fraternization, against DADT, and it could potentially create a wedge in the team--or more accurately, would have and could have. Past tense. He wasn't likely to see Ronon again; sure, the Ancients had said that one day they might be "allowed" to return, but that day could be in a year, or ten, or a hundred. There was no guarantee that either of them would be around for when that happened.
Given that, he didn't think it should be wrong to imagine someone holding him up for a change, letting someone else enfold him in strong arms while he leaned against a broad chest. He'd never know for, so what was the harm in wondering if Ronon's ass looked as good out of those leather pants as it did in them? It couldn't hurt anyone now, not when he was three million fucking light-years away from one of the best men he'd ever had the privilege of serving with, a man who understood how hard it was to be the one responsible for leading your friends to their deaths.
John tried to tell himself that it was better this way, but he knew he was lying.
v. Helia
First, she had been shocked. Not only were there Tau'ri alive and in the Pegasus galaxy, but they were no longer the crude primitives she remembered. Then she had been grateful, both for the rescue and that they had awakened the city and not damaged it too badly.
But the idea that they would be permitted to stay...Helia shook her head. Debt or no debt, Atlantis was their home, a home they had never thought to see again. She ran a hand over the smooth surface of the wall, smiling as she felt the pulse of the city beneath her fingers. She had not yet been able to bring herself to go to her old apartments; she wasn't sure she was ready to see the traces of another--especially not another from a younger race--in the place that had once been hers.
They had been so earnest, like children hoping to impress their parents. And like children, they had to be told gently, but firmly, that it was time to leave. One day, they might be allowed to return, but for now, she wanted to become re-acquainted with the city that she'd missed so much.
Her city.
vi. Atlantis
For a brief moment, she had felt complete. The Builders had returned, and they would join with the young ones, adding their wisdom to the energy and enthusiasm of their descendants to restore her to what she once was. It wasn't quite as startling as being roused from her millenia-long sleep had been, but it still felt good to have systems in use and rooms opened that the young ones hadn't need or hadn't found.
She was disappointed. The Builders wanted her to themselves, and forced the young ones to leave. She was awake now, and not as lonely as she'd been the first thousand years or so after they'd abandoned her, but she still missed the others. To the Builders, she was their creation and their tool, and if they loved her, it was for what she did. To the children of Athos and Earth, she was myth and legend and wonder, to be approached with reverence and in return, to be welcomed by her. They loved her for what she was.
She missed Carson, sweet and shy and a little afraid of her. She missed Rodney and the unfettered joy that only she ever saw each time he uncovered another of her secrets. And oh, how she missed John, who adored her and would have died a hundred times to protect her.
When the Asurans came, bringing their hatred and anger and discord that froze like the rapacity and greed of the Wraith burned, she was torn between mourning the deaths of her creators and a guilty hope that the young ones would return to defend her.
John will come back, she told herself in whispers that the Asurans couldn't hear. They'll all come back.
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Fandom: Stargate: Atlantis
Characters: Ronon, Rodney, Teyla, John, Helia, Atlantis
Archive:
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Rating: PG-13
Length: 2, 270 words
Summary: Everyone misses somebody.
Warnings: Spoilers through "The Return (Part 1)"
Disclaimer: None of these people are mine, and I'm not making any money. OMGMGMDUNSUE!
Notes: Well, here it is: my first SGA fic, written for the "Missing Persons" challenge on
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i. Ronon
He'd expected to miss Sheppard. The man may not have been his Task Master--never that again, because Kell had made what should have been a title of honor into something vile--but Ronon was still mostly a soldier, and John was his commander. And if he was being honest with himself, which he tried to be since the alternative was pointless, he considered Sheppard a friend. Even if Teyla hadn't told him about her conversation with Sheppard on the way to Sateda, he would have known that John felt the same, because as stupid and reckless as it had been, he'd insisted on coming back for him.
He'd been a little more surprised at how much he missed Weir. Most of the time, her insistence on talking through everything gave him a headache. Sometimes the way she looked at him reminded him of Melena, and he had to turn away. But for all that he thought she was naive, she was a good woman.
It was when he first realized that he missed Rodney McKay that Ronon started wondering if he'd finally lost it. There wasn't any one thing; it was just that as the days away from Atlantis turned into weeks, he began to realize how much McKay's acid tongue had become a constant in his life over the past year. He kept turning around, expecting to hear McKay's non-stop grumbling that always seemed to fade into an oddly pleasant background noise.
When he'd first joined Sheppard's team, Ronon couldn't figure out why McKay went on missions. In the field, his collection of health issues made him a liability; Ronon wasn't sure initially whether his scientific gifts were sufficient compensation for the constant whining, the arrogance, and the unending litany of complaints about the weather, the food, the flora and fauna on whatever planet they happened to be on and their prospects for survival. It wasn't until Ronon had been around Atlantis for a while that he realized that McKay really was as smart as he claimed to be. He was condescending and it rankled, but unlike Weir, who tended to be gently patronizing, especially to non-Earthers, McKay treated everyone as though they were stupid. Compared to him nearly everyone was, so Ronon stopped taking it personally. Seven years Running had taught him a lot about building walls, but where he was smooth stone, McKay was a thornbush, which is why he hadn't recognized it right off.
Once he realized that McKay's abrasiveness was a defense, Ronon just smiled when the scientist went on one of his tirades. In a strange way, he began to appreciate them. Even when he didn't understand what McKay was on about, an occasional word here or there would spark, rekindling parts of his brain that had atrophied during his years as a Runner, when he had to put aside everything that wasn't about survival. Sometimes he thought that McKay might actually understand that, if he talked to him, but he'd never felt like there was a good time. Now, with the Atlanteans back on Earth, he'd probably never have the chance to find out.
ii. Rodney
This time, Rodney had his own lab, with everything set up to his specifications. He'd requested four of the best people from other groups. He'd poked at a couple of projects that had real potential. He had an obscene amount of money since he'd had nothing to spend it on for two-and-a-half years. He didn't have Ren faire rejects shooting him in the ass with crossbows, sadistic fascist sociopaths carving up his arm, or a bunch of Goth-wannabe space vampires trying to suck his life out through his chest.
He also didn't have Atlantis, which is why instead of being thrilled at being back on the planet of coffee and chocolate and poutine and the Internet and his cat, he was utterly miserable.
There'd been so much he hadn't gotten around to looking into (as was made obvious when Helia called up that control station he'd had no idea was there), parts of the city to explore still, all sorts of things to do that he might well be missing out on forever. And...he missed the people. John and Carson and Elizabeth were just in Colorado, and Radek was at least on the same planet, but Ronon and Teyla were in another god damned galaxy and if they hadn't been there the stupid Ancients would've still had another couple million light years to go before making it to Earth and it wasn't fair that they'd just given them forty-eight hours to get out and now he was never going to see Teyla again.
He was a little surprised at how much that it hurt, a tightness in his chest that would have made him worry that something had lemon juice in it or that he was having an asthma attack if it didn't happen every single time he thought about her. It made sense when he thought about it, though. She wasn't really his type (although she was kind of blonde, which shouldn't have worked as well with her gorgeous coffee-and-caramel-colored skin that he couldn't help wanting to lick, just a little along her neck). But okay, so she wasn't as smart as he was; there were only a handful of people who were, right? And it's not like she'd had a chance to go to college or anything on Athos. But she was competent and sexy and thoughtful and gorgeous and brave and loyal and beautiful and there was no way she could be interested in him that way, especially not with someone like Sheppard around because guys like him always got the incredible women (or the incredible un-Ascended Ancients, as the case may be) and there was no reason she--Teyla--should ever look twice at a short, pudgy allergic-to-everything nerd who'd probably drop those sticks if he tried to fight with them and then John and Ronon would laugh and he'd be positively mortified....
...and he'd have traded everything he had on Earth right now for the chance to humiliate himself like that if it meant seeing her one more time.
iii. Teyla
Teyla was used to feeling apart from her people. As a child, there had been the Wraith-sense; later, she was their leader and needed to maintain the appearance of impartiality. That was no longer true--since moving from Atlantis to the mainland the Athosians had looked to Halling more and more--but now, she felt stranded, not of Earth, but no longer entirely of Athos.
For the first time, she truly understood what Michael had felt.
It was awkward, and made even worse be the constant attempts of her friends to push her and Ronon together. Only Halling said nothing, and gently distracted them when he thought the teasing and innuendo was going too far. She liked Ronon--loved him, even, but as a sibling, like she loved Carson and Elizabeth and yes, even Rodney.
Not John.
During the first few months after the Tau'ri came to Pegasus, she told herself that it was only friendship. She valued his trust and the rare glimpses of his heart that he shared with her, and she respected him as her commander in battle.
She wasn't certain when she'd fallen in love with him, but she'd known as soon as she realized it that it couldn't happen. While the rest of Atlantis only saw the effectiveness of Sheppard's team, and marvelled at how four wildly different people managed to work together well and get along almost as well--yes, even Rodney--she knew that the team's closeness was a delicate balance that had been hard-won. If she and John became lovers, that balance would be lost. Ronon would see it as a distraction for John in the battle against the Wraith; Rodney would resent her becoming closer to John and claiming what he would consider more than her fair share of John's attention, and John, with his culture's strange ideas about women would try to protect her, even if it interfered with the mission.
So when she left, she touched her forehead to his, and tried not to think about him kissing her and to wonder if he would ever have done that had he been himself. And despite her brave words, she was afraid that she would never see him again as she stood and watched him step through the gate for the last time.
iv. John
It wasn't fair, and John knew it. His new team couldn't help not being his old one. But it still seemed wrong to go through the gate and not have Teyla at his side, always knowing the right thing to say, Rodney, coming up with something that really was brilliant even if he bitched about it the whole time, and Ronon there to watch their backs. They'd all become close enough that half the time, he didn't need to go through the whole thing of explaining himself because they could all keep up without having to use clumsy, awkward words. As he'd told Teyla once, they were his family--which is why he felt a little guilty every time he jerked off in his nearly-empty apartment and thought of Ronon.
It was inappropriate fraternization, against DADT, and it could potentially create a wedge in the team--or more accurately, would have and could have. Past tense. He wasn't likely to see Ronon again; sure, the Ancients had said that one day they might be "allowed" to return, but that day could be in a year, or ten, or a hundred. There was no guarantee that either of them would be around for when that happened.
Given that, he didn't think it should be wrong to imagine someone holding him up for a change, letting someone else enfold him in strong arms while he leaned against a broad chest. He'd never know for, so what was the harm in wondering if Ronon's ass looked as good out of those leather pants as it did in them? It couldn't hurt anyone now, not when he was three million fucking light-years away from one of the best men he'd ever had the privilege of serving with, a man who understood how hard it was to be the one responsible for leading your friends to their deaths.
John tried to tell himself that it was better this way, but he knew he was lying.
v. Helia
First, she had been shocked. Not only were there Tau'ri alive and in the Pegasus galaxy, but they were no longer the crude primitives she remembered. Then she had been grateful, both for the rescue and that they had awakened the city and not damaged it too badly.
But the idea that they would be permitted to stay...Helia shook her head. Debt or no debt, Atlantis was their home, a home they had never thought to see again. She ran a hand over the smooth surface of the wall, smiling as she felt the pulse of the city beneath her fingers. She had not yet been able to bring herself to go to her old apartments; she wasn't sure she was ready to see the traces of another--especially not another from a younger race--in the place that had once been hers.
They had been so earnest, like children hoping to impress their parents. And like children, they had to be told gently, but firmly, that it was time to leave. One day, they might be allowed to return, but for now, she wanted to become re-acquainted with the city that she'd missed so much.
Her city.
vi. Atlantis
For a brief moment, she had felt complete. The Builders had returned, and they would join with the young ones, adding their wisdom to the energy and enthusiasm of their descendants to restore her to what she once was. It wasn't quite as startling as being roused from her millenia-long sleep had been, but it still felt good to have systems in use and rooms opened that the young ones hadn't need or hadn't found.
She was disappointed. The Builders wanted her to themselves, and forced the young ones to leave. She was awake now, and not as lonely as she'd been the first thousand years or so after they'd abandoned her, but she still missed the others. To the Builders, she was their creation and their tool, and if they loved her, it was for what she did. To the children of Athos and Earth, she was myth and legend and wonder, to be approached with reverence and in return, to be welcomed by her. They loved her for what she was.
She missed Carson, sweet and shy and a little afraid of her. She missed Rodney and the unfettered joy that only she ever saw each time he uncovered another of her secrets. And oh, how she missed John, who adored her and would have died a hundred times to protect her.
When the Asurans came, bringing their hatred and anger and discord that froze like the rapacity and greed of the Wraith burned, she was torn between mourning the deaths of her creators and a guilty hope that the young ones would return to defend her.
John will come back, she told herself in whispers that the Asurans couldn't hear. They'll all come back.
(no subject)
Date: 2007-01-12 02:03 am (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2007-01-13 11:37 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2007-01-12 03:14 am (UTC)This is a very nice piece. Surprising twists, good characterizations and, yes, Atlantis's POV is especially cool.
(no subject)
Date: 2007-01-13 11:37 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2007-01-12 03:21 am (UTC)(no subject)
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Date: 2007-01-12 05:33 am (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2007-01-14 10:02 am (UTC)(no subject)
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Date: 2007-01-12 07:01 pm (UTC):)
(no subject)
Date: 2007-01-14 10:07 am (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2007-01-12 09:01 pm (UTC)(no subject)
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Date: 2007-01-14 10:21 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2007-01-15 08:46 am (UTC)Sriously, this was lovely. Helia and Atlantis' pov's - yay, exactly, just like that.
Thanks for sharing! :)
(no subject)
Date: 2007-01-17 11:04 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2007-01-19 04:09 pm (UTC)Plus, so much yay for you writing in a fandom I'm into! :D *cheers*
(no subject)
Date: 2008-05-08 01:56 pm (UTC)