Because of course that would be a genuine fear, and of course the people who don't have it wouldn't realize that it could possibly be -- and I don't know whether it would be worse to believe that you had been betrayed to someone who would use you thus or to realize that someone believes you capable of using them thus.
There are a few places where I would have added punctuation marks -- without them, the story has a rapid, breathless pace. If this was meant as a deliberate effect to give the story action-scene immediacy, it might work better if you broke the sentences into short separate ones entirely.
no subject
Because of course that would be a genuine fear, and of course the people who don't have it wouldn't realize that it could possibly be -- and I don't know whether it would be worse to believe that you had been betrayed to someone who would use you thus or to realize that someone believes you capable of using them thus.
There are a few places where I would have added punctuation marks -- without them, the story has a rapid, breathless pace. If this was meant as a deliberate effect to give the story action-scene immediacy, it might work better if you broke the sentences into short separate ones entirely.
I look forward to more of your work.