I like the image of John in a sex club, reaching into a brandy snifter full of condoms

Who *doesn't*?

...okay, wait, I know the answer to this....

I'll just stop right there, thanks.

Dude. Feel free to keep going. As in, telling that story. Absolutly. I'm bringing the pompoms.

So, not Elizabeth, as I'd guessed? (C'mon, share!)