M7G-512 by Martha (and cat)
Aug. 31st, 2006 06:38 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
khriskin posting in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png){kind=small}
sga_flashficTITLE: M7G-512 (or: Why Gate Team 5 is No Longer Allowed To Write Their Own Mission Reports)
LENGTH: 264 words
AU:Imaginary Gate Team 5
SUMMARY: Not everyone is good at paperwork
PAIRINGS: None/GenFic
MOOD/RATING: Humor/PG-13/R? for language, lots of cursing
WARNINGS/SPOILERS: None
NOTES: I blame my fictives. *nod**nod*
M7G-512
(or: Why Gate Team 5 is No Longer Allowed To Write Their Own Mission Reports)
John stared at the mission report for a long while, caught somewhere between laughter and frustration. While the newest gate team was good on the ground, their writing style left a lot to be desired. With a sigh he set about editing the latest submission into something a little less R-rated.
Mission Filename: #502 Revenge of the Goddamned Giant Lizards From Hell
[EDIT]
Mission Filename: #502 Dino Planet
Date: Yesterday
[EDIT]
Date: 12 July 2006
Planet Designation: Fucking hunk of rock and jungle that was hot as hell, complete with giant lizards that kept trying to kill us.
[EDIT]
Planet Designation: M7G-512
Purpose: To get the Goddamned ZPM that the Goddammed ancients keep leaving in the midst of Goddammed hell-holes of planets because they hate us. The really do. They probably planned this whole thing in intricate detail because they are fucking evil. EVIL.
[EDIT]
Purpose: To find the ZPM in the city as indicated in the Ancient's notes.
Result: No we didn't bring back the Goddammed ZPM, there was a dinosaur guarding it you moron. A really big fucking thing with giant teeth and eyes the size of dinner plates. Like that stupid fucking fairy tale with the three giant dogs. Those Ancients weren't right in the head, seriously.
[EDIT]
Result: No ZPM.
Locals: Have all been eaten by the fucking dinosaurs.
[EDIT]
Locals: None encountered.
Possible Resources/Trading Opportunities: Really big omelets.
... [EDIT]
Possible Resources/Trading Opportunities: None.
Recommendation: C-4 and dino burgers, 'nuff said.
[EDIT]
Recommendation: Neutralize local wildlife through increased firepower and search ruins for ZPM.
[SAVE]
"STARGATE ATLANTIS", "STARGATE SG1" and other related entities are owned, (TM) and © by MGM TELEVISION and DOUBLE SECRET PRODUCTION in association with GEKKO FILMS and THE SCIFI CHANNEL. All rights reserved. No copyright infringement is intended nor implied.
(Looking for more fanfic/fantasy/scifi/poetry/etc to read? Then check out The Unforgotten Country! http://www.martha.net/unforgotten)
Technorati tags: writing | fiction | fantasy | science fiction | the unforgotten country
LENGTH: 264 words
AU:Imaginary Gate Team 5
SUMMARY: Not everyone is good at paperwork
PAIRINGS: None/GenFic
MOOD/RATING: Humor/PG-13/R? for language, lots of cursing
WARNINGS/SPOILERS: None
NOTES: I blame my fictives. *nod**nod*
M7G-512
(or: Why Gate Team 5 is No Longer Allowed To Write Their Own Mission Reports)
John stared at the mission report for a long while, caught somewhere between laughter and frustration. While the newest gate team was good on the ground, their writing style left a lot to be desired. With a sigh he set about editing the latest submission into something a little less R-rated.
Mission Filename: #502 Revenge of the Goddamned Giant Lizards From Hell
[EDIT]
Mission Filename: #502 Dino Planet
Date: Yesterday
[EDIT]
Date: 12 July 2006
Planet Designation: Fucking hunk of rock and jungle that was hot as hell, complete with giant lizards that kept trying to kill us.
[EDIT]
Planet Designation: M7G-512
Purpose: To get the Goddamned ZPM that the Goddammed ancients keep leaving in the midst of Goddammed hell-holes of planets because they hate us. The really do. They probably planned this whole thing in intricate detail because they are fucking evil. EVIL.
[EDIT]
Purpose: To find the ZPM in the city as indicated in the Ancient's notes.
Result: No we didn't bring back the Goddammed ZPM, there was a dinosaur guarding it you moron. A really big fucking thing with giant teeth and eyes the size of dinner plates. Like that stupid fucking fairy tale with the three giant dogs. Those Ancients weren't right in the head, seriously.
[EDIT]
Result: No ZPM.
Locals: Have all been eaten by the fucking dinosaurs.
[EDIT]
Locals: None encountered.
Possible Resources/Trading Opportunities: Really big omelets.
... [EDIT]
Possible Resources/Trading Opportunities: None.
Recommendation: C-4 and dino burgers, 'nuff said.
[EDIT]
Recommendation: Neutralize local wildlife through increased firepower and search ruins for ZPM.
[SAVE]
"STARGATE ATLANTIS", "STARGATE SG1" and other related entities are owned, (TM) and © by MGM TELEVISION and DOUBLE SECRET PRODUCTION in association with GEKKO FILMS and THE SCIFI CHANNEL. All rights reserved. No copyright infringement is intended nor implied.
(Looking for more fanfic/fantasy/scifi/poetry/etc to read? Then check out The Unforgotten Country! http://www.martha.net/unforgotten)
Technorati tags: writing | fiction | fantasy | science fiction | the unforgotten country