I Have Spat Out the Bile of Defeat by Eliyes (Ways to Die Challenge)

[eliyes.livejournal.com]

Title: I Have Spat Out the Bile of Defeat
Pairing(s): none
Word Count: 793
Spoilers: Up to and including SGA 3x13 "Irresponsible"
Author's Note: The title is taken from the song Madame Guillotine from the musical The Scarlet Pimpernel. Further thematic inspiration for this story was found in the song Falcon In the Dive, from the same musical. It just seemed to suit.



John Sheppard.

It was a name to conjure nightmares with. John Sheppard had woken the Wraith early, for which a galaxy should curse his name. John Sheppard controlled the City of the Ancestors. John Sheppard had flying vehicles that could reflect weapons' fire, turn invisible, and hang soundlessly in the air. John Sheppard was capable of anything, under that smiling buffoon's demeanor.

He had single-handedly destroyed an elite Genii task force. He had survived encounters with the Wraith again and again, on planets, on hive ships – he had destroyed hive ships! He had hidden his entire city from the Wraith! Yes, John Sheppard had saved the City of the Ancestors, and the Athosians. He was hailed as a hero on a dozen planets, when he should have been reviled.

Oh, yes, he was impressive. A survivor, a leader, a killer. Kolya could respect his skills, even as he hated him. Sheppard was responsible for the upheaval among the Genii, Kolya's own exile in disgrace, and the death of hundreds – if not thousands – of the Genii and their allies. Now that traitor Radim played at being allies with Atlantis. It made sense, in it's way. They were powerful and dangerous; better to have them with the Genii than against them.

Except Kolya could not accept that, knowing what he knew of John Sheppard. He had thought that Sheppard's one constant was an unwavering enmity for the Wraith. Kolya knew that capturing and making use of a Wraith as he had would have been stepping over a line in the eyes of many. Certainly Radim would embrace it as an excuse to never allow his return.

He had been wrong. He had once again underestimated John Sheppard. He had not anticipated him allying himself with the Wraith, somehow convincing it not only not to kill him, but to help him. Sheppard had been on the very brink of death and still he had escaped!

Kolya could not forget the moment Sheppard's voice had come to him, promising to kill him when next they met. He had heard the threat, the roar of his name, angry – and strong. Much stronger than Sheppard had any right to be at that point. In that moment, he had felt fear.

Every warrior knows that he will eventually meet the foe he cannot match. (Kolya did not count the Wraith; they were a monstrous, ravening scourge of all people, even those crazy enough to worship their terrible power.) Now he felt his own mortality, a confusing weakness in the face of John Sheppard's inexplicable success.

Scouting parties had gone back and found the men who had pursued the Wraith-aged Sheppard. They were dead, clearly fed on by the creature. Of the escaped prisoners, there was no sign. His informant network had brought him word when Sheppard turned up again – looking healthy and whole, every bit as young as he'd been before Kolya had captured him.

It wasn't possible.

He heard whispers among the men, that this “ATA gene” which allowed some of those from Atlantis to awaken the artifact technology of the Ancestors meant that they were the direct blood of the Ancestors, or perhaps even Ancestors themselves.

He himself was ready to believe that Sheppard was not human, not a man as the Genii were men. He was some uncanny creature from beyond the known worlds. He might even be some creation of the Wraith –

He was was an accursed phantom, and he would haunt Kolya until he personally killed and burnt to ash John Sheppard, with no interference from Doctors McKay or Beckett and their unnatural scientific artifices.

He would not be able to move forward with any plans for a coup until Sheppard was taken completely out of the picture. This he knew. He knew. And so he spread the word that he would reward anyone who brought him word of Sheppard's activities, and more if they could provide him with Sheppard's whereabouts before he left.

So it was that he was now directing his men on a methodical takeover of a laughably bucolic village, on the say-so of a pathetic mercenary who was once a proud soldier of the Genii. Kolya had shed the civilian guise he'd worn since his banishment, and he stepped into the town square as his proper self, in his uniform.

As soon as he did, he knew Sheppard was there. He'd never held much faith in predestination – he had believed that the Genii would triumph through skill and power and planning – but now he felt the presence of fate in every moment. The confrontation was coming, and this time there would be no quarter and no escape whatsoever.

One way or another, only one of them would survive.

---

How the devil can I ever prevail when I'm only a man?
I can never be duped by that scurrilous phantom again!

---

Comments

[iamrighthere.livejournal.com]

Now that I think about it, Sheppard's relative 'success' in the Pegasus galaxy could seem to someone like Kolya as a result of skill, not of coincidence. You have taken a look at the big picture, here, which puts Sheppard out there as a mistaken hero with uncanny abilities to work the Ancient city, convince the Wraith to work with him, and everything else. A nice take on Kolya, who must have pondered his new enemy for a long, long time. I'm sure he felt that he and Sheppard would one day face each other in a fight to the death. Shame their final confrontation was so lame in the show... If only YOU had written that episode!

[eliyes.livejournal.com]

Thank you! I find Kolya (and the Genii in general) interesting, and I was a little nervous about trying to get inside his head, to be honest. I'm glad you think it worked! I actually sat down intending to write a story from John's perspective about Kolya...

"Irresponsible" isn't my favourite episode -- it's like they put some plot elements from previous episodes in a hat and pulled out three -- but it has some moments that are interesting to think about.

And I like Rodney's description of Batman. :)

[kriadydragon.livejournal.com]

Interesting. I think you captured Kolya's mindset very well. The show really should have done more with his and Sheppard's final confrontation. It had felt too cheap and quick, a good show-down sacrificed for the sake of comedy. I think that's always been my personal problem with any show - all the potential for great episodes and characters being wasted for the sake of something else.

warning: extensive blather on the motivations of Acastus Kolya

[eliyes.livejournal.com]

The thing is, I think Kolya lost his chance for a big dramatic showdown. He's the one who went looking for John -- I really think on some level John (and the Atlantis crew, but John, in Kolya's mind) had eroded his options. He couldn't go home. He couldn't triumph over them. He couldn't explain how Sheppard had pulled this magic "I'm not dead!" act. He needed to kill Sheppard to move forward, and if he couldn't do that, then he needed to die. He wanted Sheppard to kill him, on some level, I think -- a worthy opponent and all that. I don't think he could see it going another way; it was him or John, finally.

"Irresponsible" tried to frame the final showdown as a little bit "cowboys at high noon", and it seemed a little out of place. I think it was supposed to. I think it was meant to be an anticlimax, because Kolya was "reduced to this".

[bironic.livejournal.com]

I love outsiders' perspectives on our characters, and Pegasus natives' even more so. This is a wonderful look at how Sheppard might appear as a malevolently larger-than-life figure who cheats death and wields awesome power.

[eliyes.livejournal.com]

So do I. The episode where Ronon kills his old taskmaster and Teyla tells him that she will keep it a secret because the others wouldn't understand? I think I might have cheered.

It's a very different playing field from the Milky Way, where the Terrans could be seen as underdogs in a galaxy of more powerful races. (Of course, that made their successes all the more perplexing to some of those powers.) Atlantis really has kind of the upper hand, in terms of technology and medicine, compared to many of the peoples they meet, who aren't the Wraith. They have an interesting range of issues that come with that status.

[fanofall.livejournal.com]

I've had this bookmarked for a month, and I'm only just reading it -- it's a really excellent look at how Kolya probably did see Sheppard. Thank you!

[eliyes.livejournal.com]

Thank you, for commenting. :3

[starwatcher]

.
One nice thing about this '25 lines' meme -- it can lead to fic we might have missed. When you wrote this, I wasn't watching SGA. Now I've bought the DVDs and watched all the eps (multiple times), and I know these people.

This is great; you really got into Kolya's head. He's not quite sane when it comes to John Sheppard. "under that smiling buffoon's demeanor" -- Kolya fears Sheppard, while trying to convince himself that the man is not really a worthy opponent, that it must be merely luck. Nicely done.
.

[eliyes.livejournal.com]

The meme has been a boon -- if for no other reason than making me go "Whoa -- she writes in that fandom, too?" a few times. (Although I'm still kinda avoiding the SGA/The Sentinel mash-ups.)

Thank you! I personally never thought Kolya was sane, but at first he was very much in control. I think he was intended to serve as a foil to Sheppard, a sort of dark look at what he could (have) become. Anyway, he was really interesting to write!

[starwatcher]

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I think he was intended to serve as a foil to Sheppard, a sort of dark look at what he could (have) become.

Oh, now that IS an interesting idea. (I need people like you to point out these things, because I'm not good at analysis.) I never thought about it before but... yeah. With John's control of Ancient technology, and his personal charisma, he would be a terrible opponent if he had less personal integrity. Wow! That's a mind-blower!
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[eliyes.livejournal.com]

If you think about how very black ops Sheppard gets in "The Storm" and "The Eye" -- his first dealing with Kolya -- it's a little more obvious there. (It's probably also a relic of how the writers originally conceived John to be a much more skilled hand-to-hand combatant.) It was black ops vs. black ops -- but Kolya operated without any kind of honourable treatment of his opponent. It's easy to think that that may be a relic of living a life where there is this terrible enemy to whom you can never give quarter -- the Wraith -- but every time we see Kolya fight, it's against other humans. And Teyla and Ronon both have warrior honour. The excuse doesn't hold.

Integrity is sort of a magic byword when it comes to John, double-edged. On the one hand:


On the other hand, look again at that first confrontation with Kolya, and all the men John killed. He told Teyla in "Sateda" that he would do anything for anyone of the family he's made/found on Atlantis. So one has to wonder, if pressed, would he go to the same dubious lengths as Kolya? Look at what he did in "Miller's Crossing" -- I don't think John is sure he isn't already on that road.

[starwatcher]

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It was black ops vs. black ops -- but Kolya operated without any kind of honourable treatment of his opponent.

and

I don't think John is sure he isn't already on that road.

The difference I see is, "who started it"? John may have self-doubts -- I think honorable men always do -- but he was responding to the situation that was thrust upon him, in defense of his people.

if pressed, would he go to the same dubious lengths as Kolya?

He might... but again, under what circumstances? If he's responding to an attack, he must use all force necessary. But if he strikes first, because 'they' might strike his people, that's the slippery slope that leads to the dark side.

But, as you say, Ronon and Teyla both have warrior honor; and the leaders of the expedition (Liz, Sam, Woolsey) are thoughtful people who weigh the issues. As long as John takes their views into account (although he may decide that the military necessities override their advice), he shouldn't go too far.

But it certainly could lead to some interesting AU fic, although it might be too dark for most people to enjoy.

I keep forgetting where you are in the world -- Germany or Italy, isn't it? Aren't you up awfully late... like, past midnight?
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[eliyes.livejournal.com]

The difference I see is, "who started it"? John may have self-doubts -- I think honorable men always do -- but he was responding to the situation that was thrust upon him, in defense of his people.

Yes, he was, and his actions certainly reflect his "no one left behind" attitude as well. However, Kolya was acting under orders. Cowen and his chiefs of staff or whatever were the ones who decided Atlantis needed to be taken for the Genii. Kolya was doing his duty. And the Genii would probably say that the Lanteans started it when they woke the Wraith. Not saying I agree, but I can see them making the argument.

But it certainly could lead to some interesting AU fic, although it might be too dark for most people to enjoy.

Ironically, I have seen this kind of fic and not read it, because it's too dark for me.

I keep forgetting where you are in the world -- Germany or Italy, isn't it? Aren't you up awfully late... like, past midnight?

XD Oh, Lord. No and no; like Rodney I'm Canadian. I'm on the east coast at present, so it just hit 11pm. ;)

[starwatcher]

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like Rodney I'm Canadian. I'm on the east coast at present, so it just hit 11pm.

Ah, yes, now I remember. I think I mix up your name with earth2skye; they both start with 'e' and, with my shaky grasp of personalities, that's sufficient for confusion. But maybe connecting you with Rodney and Canadian will help me remember. I'm Mountain time zone, so it's just past 8:00 for me.

However, Kolya was acting under orders. Cowen and his chiefs of staff or whatever were the ones who decided Atlantis needed to be taken for the Genii.

True. But, as you said, Kolya didn't follow his orders with a warrior's honor -- using non-military as hostages, and killing them to make a point puts him beyond the pale, as far as I'm concerned.

OTOH, 'our' side is not guiltless; synecdochic stopped watching SGA after Season 2 because of the way they played fast-and-loose with genetic experimentation of the wraith, and how the then-humans were treated. It's a great loss not to have her writing in SGA anymore, but we all have to draw our lines somewhere. I think the issue was shown to be very iffy when it came back several times (via Michael) to bite them on the ass, so it doesn't bother me as much, but of course, she didn't get to see that -- and might not agree, anyway.

I have seen this kind of fic and not read it, because it's too dark for me.

Not surprised. I certainly wouldn't be attracted to it.
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[eliyes.livejournal.com]

Kolya didn't follow his orders with a warrior's honor -- using non-military as hostages, and killing them to make a point puts him beyond the pale, as far as I'm concerned.

I think most people would agree with that, but, given the things done in Season 2 that gave people like synecdochic some very valid issues with the show, I think it's fair to wonder if, at that point in time, Sheppard was a lot closer to crossing that line separating him and Kolya than it's really comfortable to consider for one of the good guys. The Atlantis expedition did a lot of questionable and some outright objectionable things in that time frame. Personally, I think they've improved since then. (And actually, if I hadn't had the first 3 seasons available to watch when I got into the fandom, I might have thrown in the towel in Season 2; I have with other shows.)

[starwatcher]

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Same here. I was only mildly interested until fanfic -- in rose-colored glasses mode -- made me love the characters, especially Sheppard and McKay. (Of course!) After that, I gobbled the first three seasons on DVD without pausing to ponder or analyze -- which I'm not good at, anyway, as I've said.

So, yeah, it's a good thing they pulled back from that line, although many people probably don't care. I introduced my best friend to SGA, and some of Syn's stories, and explained why she's not watching/writing SGA anymore. BF doesn't see it; as far she's concerned, it's the Wraith, and they deserve whatever they get.

For me, I just don't want to see the characters I enjoy get bent to the dark side. All else is "just TV" -- and all the inadequate or unsatisfying bits can be solved via the magic of fanfic. <g>
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[eliyes.livejournal.com]

I actually find that a lot of fanfic seems to portray McKay especially as much worse than he is in the show. I kinda went at it from the other direction -- I got sucked in by a crossover fic with someone else I read, and then mainlines the first two seasons before looking for fic. I honestly think this fandom is the best one for fanfic, quantity and quality, that I have ever been in! :D

[starwatcher]

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I actually find that a lot of fanfic seems to portray McKay especially as much worse than he is in the show.

Hmm... we must be reading different authors. I've found that the stories I read treat McKay -- I guess 'honorably' would be the best description. They show his ego and/or his fear, but also the man behind it, the hidden insecurities that lead to that behavior. I don't know if that's guessing, or really good people reading, but I like the result, so I go with it.
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[eliyes.livejournal.com]

Okay, yes, I have found many of those. It's probably just the proportion of stories that bug me a little seems higher to me. The ones where McKay makes people cry on a daily basis and likes it, where he's actively mean rather than just impatient and a bit oblivious. Of course, I also have a problem with the stories where John's been mean to Rodney since the beginning, or since Doranda, which isn't so; the ones were we hit 4th or 5th season and John leaning his shoulder against Rodney's is a big deal because he's omg never done that before at which point I'm calling up screencaps of the second episode, where the two of them were sitting side my side with their feet up and their shoulders mashed together.

It's a little like fics where people portray Jim as very cold and totally miss out on the warmly affectionate, big brotherly kind of guy he can be.

[brasslizard.livejournal.com]

First off, the Scarlet Pimpernel is my all time favorite musical [insert fanatical squee] and it's fun to see the character comparisons.


Kolya really does make a nice Chauvelin; I can see a lot of similarities there. However, I can't see John as Percy. They both have their masks and they're both driven to protect, true, but their methods and mindsets are very different. Percy relies almost solely on trickery and deceit and, I think, does what he does almost as much for the thrill as he does because it's the right thing.

It would make for a really GREAT au, though. *grin*

[eliyes.livejournal.com]

Well, I meant to compare Koyla to Chauvelin without comparing John and Percy. Because you're right, it's not a good match. And if the Baroness Orczy's prose is to be believed, Percy does it more for the thrill than because it's the right thing. He's also one teetering step from madness. John's crazy in a totally different way.

I have seen fanart that seemed to have been made with that AU in mind. ;D

[brasslizard.livejournal.com]

Oh, yes; if you go strictly by the books, Percy's all about the thrill. I notice that the movies and plays and such tend to downplay that. Understandably so - kind of hard to get the full effect of the "tragic romance" otherwise. (What is it with our boys and their communication failures?)

Ah yes...John's brand of crazy. I remember watching the series finale thinking "what? AGAIN? Seriously?."

Oooh. I don't suppose you have a link to said fanart...?

[eliyes.livejournal.com]

Ah, but the movies and plays put more emphasis on the boys than th books, thankfully! Anthony Andrews' Percy will always be my favourite (although Sills is a very close second, these days!)

Ha, the finale. XD I'm pretty sure his teammates had the exact same reaction as you. Someday I will finish an episode tag for that episode. Someday!

The link (http://ileliberte.livejournal.com/56696.html#cutid1). :D The artist was going more for a Regency look, granted, but with the foppishness and the vivid colours, I still think Pimpernel thoughts~