My Soul From Out That Shadow, by Frostfire

[frostfire-17.livejournal.com]

Title: My Soul From Out That Shadow
Author: Frostfire
Rating: PG-13
Spoilers: Poisoning the Well
Notes: Right. First story. *deep breaths* Unbeta'd because I know exactly zero people in fandom. Feel free to come over to my LJ and help change that.
Also, title from "The Raven"
Summary: Steve has some issues.

Major Sheppard has not come yet today.

He paces his cell. The Lieutenant, the young one, has been standing among the regular guards. He does not know why this person was placed here, just as he does not know why Major Sheppard comes more often, and he does not know why they have been taking tissue samples from his body.

Often, he finds it difficult to care.

He thinks, when he can think. They are conducting experiments. They are researching his body. They are—

—they stand so close. The regular guards will stay far away, as far from him as they can go and remain in the chamber. He sneers at them as he makes a turn; he can smell their fear, see it in their nervous glances as they hug the wall and their pathetic weapons. The Sergeant, when he comes, will step up to the wall, but only for a minute. The Lieutenant stands there, watching him, young and frightened and so close so close he could reach through the bars and have him—

Were it not for the force field, of course.

He remembers the force field. He knows it is there. It is merely…sometimes difficult to concentrate.

He paces. Three angry strides, or five calm ones, and he moves from force field to force field. The Lieutenant remains where he is, and the hunger waxes and wanes as he moves from one end of the cell to the other.

And Major Sheppard…

Major Sheppard speaks to him from barely a hand’s length away. Major Sheppard taunts, and teases, and paces around and around and around his blue-lit world until he thinks he will batter himself against the field until he is unconscious. So close.

The guards he would feed on for revenge, and for nourishment. The young Lieutenant he would savor, each second of feeding, each year of life, correspondent to each hour he has spent staring at the dark face beyond the bars. Major Sheppard…

He wants Major Sheppard under his hand like he has wanted no other. Had he fed on hundreds, were he sated enough to last for a thousand years, he would fight to the death for the privilege. Were he starving, he would give up dozens of easy victims for one chance—so close, so close—

When the Major arrives, he no longer steps up to the cell’s edge to speak with him. He does not think he could control himself; he does not think he would remember the force field, with Sheppard’s face so close to his. He forgot himself once, in a fit of rage as much as hunger, and he will not risk it again.

For the Major teases, and taunts. And if Sheppard knew how the hunger multiplies whenever he steps into the room, how staying in the middle of the cell is an ordeal almost unendurable—

“Hi, Steve.”

So close.

Comments

[akire-yta.livejournal.com]

this is your first fic? Wow, its good!


*waves*

And now you know one person in this fandom! *g*

[frostfire-17.livejournal.com]

*blush* Thanks! I have written fiction before, just never really fanfic...I'm glad you liked it.
*waves back* You are the first person to comment on my first posted fic. You get a special place in my memory. Yay!

[teaphile.livejournal.com]

Nice insight into Steve. It's hard to see the Wraith as people, but you handled it well.

[frostfire-17.livejournal.com]

Thanks! I spent awhile rewatching the Steve parts of the episode, trying to get a handle on him. Glad you liked it!

[davechicken.livejournal.com]

Oooh. I did like this. There's a nice, quiet lyricism to it.

Nice work :)

[frostfire-17.livejournal.com]

Oh, thanks...I was really hoping the style would work.
*sparkles* I'm lyrical! Yay.

[clammymammy.livejournal.com]

That was creepy and well written! Cool beans! I'll look for more by you:)

[frostfire-17.livejournal.com]

Thanks! Wow, I'm attracting, like, fans...

...heh. I'm creepy. Go me.

Glad you liked it!

[delurker.livejournal.com]

This is wonderful! You fit so much into such a small space. And you use dashes. *swoons with pleasure*

I loved this bit especially:

He thinks, when he can think. They are conducting experiments. They are researching his body. They are—

—they stand so close. The regular guards will stay far away, as far from him as they can go and remain in the chamber. He sneers at them as he makes a turn; he can smell their fear, see it in their nervous glances as they hug the wall and their pathetic weapons. The Sergeant, when he comes, will step up to the wall, but only for a minute. The Lieutenant stands there, watching him, young and frightened and so close so close he could reach through the bars and have him—

Were it not for the force field, of course.

[frostfire-17.livejournal.com]

Heh. I looooove dashes. I use them...a lot. My favorite punctuation mark after the semicolon. (English nerd! English nerd!)

Yeah, I was happy with that part, too, especially the "They are--they stand so close" transition.

So glad you liked it!

[lemonbella.livejournal.com]

Yay! Steve fic! This is fabulous, I love that Steve is articulating exactly what Sheppard is trying to make him feel.

[frostfire-17.livejournal.com]

Yeah, there totally needs to be more Steve fic. Because, come on. Steve is awesome. And Sheppard, my friend, you are a manipulative little bastard. *grins*

Glad you enjoyed it! (you said it was fabulous! *swoons from praise* Yay.)

[clarkangel.livejournal.com]

Very cool. Next time I watch that ep I'm so going to be seeing THIS.

[frostfire-17.livejournal.com]

*steeples fingers* My work here is done.

...glad you liked it. ^_^

[amezri.livejournal.com]

First fic? Whoa. You've got a good handle on the Wraith, that's for sure. Very well written.

[frostfire-17.livejournal.com]

Well, first *fan*fic. But yeah, thanks for the compliment! (I got a "whoa"!) I was really hoping I'd gotten the characterization down.

[coreopsis.livejournal.com]

Oh, that's a really good look into Steve's head. I like it very much. :-)

[frostfire-17.livejournal.com]

Thanks! Steve is awesome. Glad you liked it!

[packmentality.livejournal.com]

Wraith!fic yay! Very creepy and very cool.

[frostfire-17.livejournal.com]

The Wraith get no love, man. And Steve especially just begs for it. Glad you liked it!

[flambeau.livejournal.com]

Mmm, I like this. (The summary definitely caught my attention.)

...and now I'm hungry.

[frostfire-17.livejournal.com]

*grins* Glad to know I can bring out the Wraith in everyone...

Also glad you liked it. And now that I've (finally) delurked myself, fandom-wise, may I say that you are an absolutely fabulous writer? I've loved your stories for awhile now.

[cathexys.livejournal.com]

that was great!!!

the eroticization of the hunger; the concept of incorporating your respected enemy and taking his life inside of you; the way he reads Sheppard's bravada as both taunt and challenge;... wonderful voice and pointr of view!

thanks for taking the plunge and sharing this!

[frostfire-17.livejournal.com]

*blinks at list* I did all that? Wow, I must be good. Go me! So glad you liked it!

And believe me, seeing as you are the...*counts*...*twelfth* person who's responded positively, I can safely say: the pleasure's all mine. ^_^

[wickedwords.livejournal.com]

Oh, this was cool. Loved this bit:

He wants Major Sheppard under his hand like he has wanted no other. Had he fed on hundreds, were he sated enough to last for a thousand years, he would fight to the death for the privilege.

The hunger/need/desire was wonderfully erotic. thanks.

[frostfire-17.livejournal.com]

Glad you liked it so much! And yeah, while watching the ep, my thoughts went something like, "Hm. If Steve were human, there would be SO MUCH SLASH right now..." and then, "Wraith!slash. Why not? Always thought that hunger thing had erotic undertones, anyway..." and thus the fic was born. And, apparently, there was much rejoicing.

And believe me, you're quite welcome.

[aithine]

Oooh, interesting viewpoint and very well done. Thanks for sharing!

[frostfire-17.livejournal.com]

Thank you and you're welcome. Yay for being original!

[elvinborn.livejournal.com]

very, very cool.
I like the perspective. and I think your version of Steve is probably spot on.
This is Really good stuff :)

[frostfire-17.livejournal.com]

Thanks! Glad you liked it! Steve needs way more love than he gets.

[rokeon.livejournal.com]

Damn.

The Wraith are creepy enough when all they do is feed to live. But that bone-deep intensity of wanting is absolutely terrifying.

[frostfire-17.livejournal.com]

I'm...terrifying.

Heh.

Go me.

*bows* Glad I could terrify. Very glad that you liked it.

[crystalheaven.livejournal.com]

This is wicked good. And your first time? Very well done. Keep up the good work. Will be looking for more by you.

[frostfire-17.livejournal.com]

Thanks! I'll definitely be at least trying to write more stuff. (How could I *not*? Soooo mannyyyy responseeees...*goes into happy overload*)

[thepouncer.livejournal.com]

Oh wow, even the imprisoned Wraith lust after Sheppard! And I was right there with Steve, driven mad by hunger and confinement and the incredible allure of having food *so close* and being unable to touch it. Mmmm.

[frostfire-17.livejournal.com]

Of course they do. He's *Sheppard*. *grins* Thanks. Glad you liked it. Go have a sandwich or something...

[tinny]

Yes! How cool to get into the head of a Wraith like that. I like the inhumanness of his thoughts - and the strange feeling that we're all united in our desire for Sheppard. :)

He wants Major Sheppard under his hand like he has wanted no other.
There is something about Sheppard. Steve has mentioned it in PTW, there is something special. I've always wondered if it's something else than the attraction we're all feeling towards him - something really special in his genes, some secret.

And if Sheppard knew how the hunger multiplies whenever he steps into the room
I know! But I think Sheppard knows, too. It's eerie to think about the fact that Sheppard taunts the Wraith like he would taunt women. Or maybe taunt is the wrong word. Tantalize, seduce. He knows he's gorgeous and he uses it without scruples.

[frostfire-17.livejournal.com]

Everyone wants Sheppard. It's a requirement. *grins* Thanks! Glad you liked it!

And Sheppard's *totally* tantalizing. When I was watching the ep, I got shivers watching him stand there and slowly, deliberately, drive Steve insane. Jesus *Christ*.

[merryish.livejournal.com]

Oh, I like this a *lot*. Wildly cool. I almost empathize. I just...happen to want Sheppard for different reasons, that's all. Very sane, normal, well-adjusted reasons.

Anyway. Excellent! Do it again! =)

[frostfire-17.livejournal.com]

Oh, of course. I want my gorgeous fictional TV characters in a sane, normal, well-adjusted way, also. Don't we all? *grins* Glad you liked it! Will work on doing it again.

Also, since I've *finally* delurked myself after far (far!) too long, may I say that I enjoy your stories? Especially "Kickoff". It's one of my favorite Sports Night stories ever.

[krabbypatty.livejournal.com]

Ohh, excellent first fic. You write Steve very well.

[frostfire-17.livejournal.com]

Thanks! Glad you liked it.

I don't know whether to be happy or disturbed that, according to just about everyone, I've gotten into Steve's head really, really, well...

[shetiger.livejournal.com]

Mmm. Very nice. I like the look at Steve, but I like what you've managed to say about Shep more. Manipulative and unafraid and a bit dark, yum. :)

[frostfire-17.livejournal.com]

Oh, Christ, yes. Did you *see* him in that episode? Slowly, deliberately, *knowingly* driving Steve insane. And then later, "I don't pity him." *shivers*

Thanks. Glad you liked it!

[tigs.livejournal.com]

This was very neat. It had a really good rhythm going on. I liked it a lot.

[frostfire-17.livejournal.com]

Thanks! I'm glad you liked it!

[astolat]

Okay, now *there's* an entrance into fandom! Someone mentioned the eroticism of the hunger; that's exactly it, and it works so well, makes the Wraith's mental processes extraordinarily alien and comprehensible at the same time. This really reminds me of the best vampire fiction, really -- you take the rather tired device of the life-sucking and make it real. Sheppard's taunting and mocking as a quasi-sexual tease, the Wraith's hierarchy of victims are both just perfect. So very well done. *applauds*

[frostfire-17.livejournal.com]

*blush* *a lot* Thanks. That means a lot, coming from such a fabulous writer. I'm really glad you liked it. *bows*

[casspeach.livejournal.com]

I really liked this glimpse into the mind of the Wraith they sometimes come across a bit cardboard cutout villainesque on the show, imho, now I shall have to rewatch all the episodes with this fic in mind (such hardship, but I'll manage somehow).

Really nicely written, taut and well-realised. I really liked the sudden cuts from one thought to another in Steve's mind.

[frostfire-17.livejournal.com]

*grins* Glad I was inspiring. And I know it's a hardship. Turn that television on! You can make it! *snicker* Thanks for the comment!