Not Quite the Jedi Mind Trick by Purna (Superpower Challenge)

[purna.livejournal.com]

Not Quite the Jedi Mind Trick by purna
360 words
Rated G and N for nipples.
Summary: A conversation overheard in a Traskan jail cell.






"This is just so embarrassing."

"Quit complaining and get on with it, Rodney."

"I can't believe this. Hey, I could use a hand here, Colonel. Please? At least help me with this stupid vest."

"Jeez, for crying out loud. There. Better?"

"Much. Okay, just let me... Colonel? Colonel?! Stop that."

"Wha...? Ow! Easy with the pokey finger of outrage. It's not like I can help myself; it's your secret superpower."

"Well, it's not a secret anymore, thanks to you."

"Life or death, Rodney. Focus."

"'Focus, Rodney. Life or death, Rodney.' I hate it when you do that."

"I know. Works though, doesn't it?"

"Shut up. You'll have to move, Sheppard. The guard can't see through you. Okay, how's this?"

"Um...no good, the guard only looks a little dazed. You're going to have to lift your shirt. Give 'em some skin."

"Wonderful. I feel like a co-ed in a Girls Gone Wild video. Spring Break 2001, anyone?"

"Mmmm. More like Southern Decadence '96, without the leather chaps."

"...Colonel? Something you want to tell me?"

"Talk later, Rodney. Escape now."

"...me Tarzan..."

"What was that?"

"Nothing, nothing. Hey, you, guard!"

"That was my ear, Rodney."

"Big baby. Yeah, you, Gomer. Come here. Check this out."

"I never get tired of this."

"Working here. Hey, Gomer, watch and listen carefully. You will release us. You will return our weapons and allow us to leave through the ring of the Ancients. Yes, the keys. You'll need those. Very good."

*

"This is great, Rodney. That's even better than the Jedi mind trick."

"'It's my gift. My curse.'"

"Thank you, Peter Parker."

"You're welcome."

"So what story are we using for the mission report this time?"

"Feel free to tell Elizabeth the truth, Colonel. 'Rodney secured our release from the Traskan jail cell with the mesmerizing power of his nipples.' Anytime... Yeah, didn't think so. Hey, can I pull my shirt down now?"

"Not yet."

"But the gate's right there, Colonel."

"I know. I mean...oh, I didn't see it. I guess so."

"Much better. I could catch a chill. It's not the tropics here, in case you hadn't noticed."

"Yeah, I guess you could say it's a little...nippy."

Comments

[fleurrochard]

...
*is DEAD*

[purna.livejournal.com]

DED from nipples!!

[cetpar.livejournal.com]

You just had to put that last line in, didn't you? Now my face hurts from smiling. *g*

[purna.livejournal.com]

I did try to resist. Very hard. Okay, not at all.

Thanks!

[buddleia.livejournal.com]

...there aren't words...

[purna.livejournal.com]

Heee!

[bibliotech.livejournal.com]

The pokey finger of outrage! That's just perfect.

[purna.livejournal.com]

Thanks!

[mecurtin.livejournal.com]

The last line! It was the whipped cream on the sundae of this fic! (I hate maraschino cherries)

I wish I had the truly appropriate icon, but Rodney's mouth will have to do.

[purna.livejournal.com]

Whipped cream. Yum. Nipples and whipped cream...

Sorry, what was that?

[rosewildeirish.livejournal.com]

HEE.

[purna.livejournal.com]

Thanks!

[turtlespeaks.livejournal.com]

*laughs so hard she coughs*

Oh. . . oh I needed that. *happy dazed grin*

[purna.livejournal.com]

Glad to help you out. :)

[pierson.livejournal.com]

*laughs*

So much fun! I loved the pokey finger of outrage. :-)

I'm also amused because rosewildeirish posted a fic yesterday about Rodney's nipples. If this is a trend, I thoroughly approve. :-D

[purna.livejournal.com]

Yay for a convergence of nipple fic! I hope for a trend, too. Rodney's nipples are worthy of much attention and admiration. :)

[nochi_san.livejournal.com]

Note to self: Don't read fics for this challenge while eating/drinking. Coke/sandwich is bad for monitor/keyboard.

Translation: Awesome. This is why writers should listen to fandom. So Rodney will flash the guards.

Damn, I almost did it with a straight face. xD

[purna.livejournal.com]

I would kill to see that in the show! Gero, you listening?

[hotspur18.livejournal.com]

Murgle. Snort. *cheers*

Lovely!

:-) xx

[purna.livejournal.com]

Thanks!

[natroga.livejournal.com]

Oh ... my god. *iz ded with laffter*

[purna.livejournal.com]

Heee.

[isiscolo.livejournal.com]

Oh, RODNEY. Magic nipples!

[purna.livejournal.com]

Hee, I just like saying it. Nipples. :D

[skeddy-kat.livejournal.com]

Ha ha ha ha ha! I loved it.

[purna.livejournal.com]

Thanks!

[maribouquet.livejournal.com]

*flails*

AWESOME.

So what happens to John when he is exposed to the superpower? Or does he perhaps have his own? I wonder...

[purna.livejournal.com]

That was when Rodney was forced to wield his pokey finger of outrage. :)

But, yeah, John so has a superpower. I think it's his hair, though.

[springwoof.livejournal.com]

::dies from the hilarity::

but, my favoritest line?
Easy with the pokey finger of outrage.

heehee!

[purna.livejournal.com]

Glad it tickled you!

[20thcenturyvole.livejournal.com]

*gapes*

Oh you did NOT!

[purna.livejournal.com]

I so did. :D The voices made me write it. The guys, they just wouldn't stop talking.

[ladycat777.livejournal.com]

AHAHAHA. Love :)

[purna.livejournal.com]

Nipple love. :D

[jade-dragoness.livejournal.com]

Bwahahaha! The Power of the Nipples!!! *damn near giggles her head off*

[purna.livejournal.com]

Behold! It is a wonderful thing!

[adafrog.livejournal.com]

bwaaa hahahaha Great

[purna.livejournal.com]

Thanks!

[zabbers.livejournal.com]

*snort* I loved the disembodied conversation style, too! :-)

[purna.livejournal.com]

I'd say it was a deliberate exercise in style, but it was how the story came to me -- an overheard conversation with no visuals. Weird. :D

[teh-gandu.livejournal.com]

*LMAO*

[purna.livejournal.com]

:D

[monanotlisa.livejournal.com]

::dies::

V. nice.

[purna.livejournal.com]

Hee. Rodney's nipples make everything nice. :)

[sgafan33.livejournal.com]

The sad thing is we don't get to see Rodney's nipples anymore with the black shirts. Although I find Rodney looking quite yummy in black. We just have to rely on the first season memories.

I personally think Rodney's ass wields more power. 8-)

[purna.livejournal.com]

Yes, I too am torn. :) I love the new shirts -- they definitely show off Rodney's lovely, lovely arms and chest better than the blue ones -- but I miss the nipple shots.

And I agree with you about Rodney's ass, but Rodney's saving that dangerous and primal power for when he really needs it. :)

[infinimato.livejournal.com]

OH MY HEAD.

I gotta stop laughing before it pops off and rolls away....

[purna.livejournal.com]

The nipple power is a little too strong with that one. Whee. :)

[in-the-bottle.livejournal.com]

Oh God... Bwah!

[purna.livejournal.com]

:D