Fic: Life's a Drag NC-17. by: angelic_mand

[teh-gandu.livejournal.com]

Title: Life’s a Drag
Author: angelic_mand
Category: Established relationship
Challenge: Skirting challenge
Word count: 4, 849
Rating: NC-17
Pairings: McKay/Beckett with Weir/Teyla and Sheppard/Ford.
Timeline: Late season two
Spoilers: Slight spoilers for season two.
Summary: McKay’s not impressed.
A/N: There’s no real reason for Elizabeth and Carson to be off-world, other than I wanted them in this fic, merely for “McKay’s” amusement.
Again unbeta read, so all mistakes are me.
Edited: Because I felt that there was something missing and hopefully the 'something' as now been filled.



Planet: M5H 341

Scene: Sheppard and co are sitting around a campfire, with the some of the natives- the Dhaks, nearby.




Sheppard can’t help his outburst.

McKay glares at the colonel. “This isn’t funny.”

Sheppard bites his bottom to prevent further laugher from erupting. “Yes, it is.”

Beckett nods in agreement. “Rodney, luv, you look….”

“Like a drag.” Ford snickers. “Although it’s a good thing you’re not, because you have to be a natural and have the qualities.”

McKay glares at the men, sitting, around the campfire, laughing-at his expense. “That’s right, pick on poor, defenceless me. Don’t worry you’ll all get your comeuppance, then who’ll be doing the laughing?”

Suddenly, his expression changes, as Ford’s words hit him. “Hey! What do you mean ‘you have to have the qualities?’ Are you saying that I don’t have what it takes to be a drag queen?”

Ford flashes him a cocky smile. “That’s exactly what I’m saying.”

Surprisingly Rodney can’t even think of a reply, so he says the first thing that pops into his mind (which is very unlike him). “Takes one to know one!” He snaps like a bitter and ungrateful child.

Ford bows down, flashing him a smile. “Thank-you.” He says, before laughing.

Unknown to the group of men, Teyla emerges from the darkness, gawking at the doctor in bewilderment, she opens her mouth to speak, but instead squeaks.

At first she can’t help wondering if she is imaging things or if it really is Doctor Rodney McKay in a red low cut top and dark knee-length skirt, but the laughter from the men, conform that she isn’t imagining it, that it really is Rodney McKay in women’s clothing.

She can’t help but jump, as a hand hits her shoulder.

“My bad, Teyla, I didn’t mean to….”

Weir’s voice trails off, as she looks at the sight in front of her: I have to be dreaming, Rodney wearing women’s clothes? She pinches herself, nope, not dreaming . She can’t help, but snicker. “My Rodney,” she steps out of the shadows (with Teyla on her heels), unable to suppress her smirk, “if you wanted to dress up, all you had to do was ask.”

Rodney feels himself darken. “This isn’t funny!” He snaps.

Teyla’s eyebrow rise, as she takes a seat next to Beckett.

Weir can’t help laughing, as she walks over to McKay. “The outfit suits you Rodney, granted, that I would have chosen a better outfit: preferable one that matches.” She throws him a cocky look. “Although the colour red really suits you: it brings out your complexion, although, I never really knew you had a feminine side. The black though, I dunno….it brings out your darker side.”

Sheppard sneers.

Ford chortles. “I don’t think any of us, other than Carson, knew McKay had this side….what other side do you have that we don’t know about?”

McKay shoots a dark look. “FYI, I’ve always been in touch with my-”

“Yeah, and pigs fly.” Sheppard interrupts. “Rodney, the day you’re in touch-”

“Rodney?” Elizabeth interrupts. “Your outfit might be nice and pretty (Rodney doesn’t fail to notice her stretching and empathising on the word ‘pretty’) and by the way, nice hairy chest,” She winks, “but do you have to hide those legs?”

And again the camp is filled with laugher. Rodney is about to reply, when Elizabeth continues.

“But” she pulls a face-far from impressed, “those heels-”

Rodney looks down at the bright yellow, wooden heels. “Hey! Leave the heels alone.”

They all hear a thud, and all they can see is Ford’s legs, although this doesn’t stop the young man from laughing.

“Well, I’ll be damned.” Sheppard mutters, as Ford struggles to get up, Sheppard smirks, before leading a helping hand.

“Carson! Help defend me, throw me a lifeline of some kind.”

Beckett’s hands shoot up, as if to surrender. “Rodney the outfit suits you, granted that it somewhat tacky…but Elizabeth’s right, those heels have to go.”

Again a thud is heard and again Ford is in fits of laughter on the floor. Sheppard shrugs, deciding to leave him there.

“And just what is wrong with these heels?” McKay snaps, getting defensive. “Am I the only one liking them?”

“The outfit clashes.” Teyla says in a matter of fact tone.

“And that makes the outfit tacky?”

“No.” Teyla say, laughing. “Had you chosen better clothing, then you would not be ‘tacky’ you would be, ‘stylish’.”

“Even I could have told you that.” Sheppard says, teasingly.

“And what would you know about style?” He asks, Teyla and Sheppard, his tone baring bitterness.

Teyla sticks out her tongue, Sheppard laughs, never has he seen such a sight: Teyla sticking her tongue out, like a child and McKay, in women’s clothing…. What’ll be next? Ford and McKay competing against each other in a drag competition?

“Oh, somebody’s got their knickers in a twist.” Ford says, teasingly.

Rodney folds his arms across his, chest, only for more laughter to erupt. He throws them a dark look, before storming off towards his hut. Or rather trying to storm off, more like hobbling, and again the camp is filled with laughter.

“There’s a reason why women wear heels McKay.” Sheppard sneers.

“Unless you’re a drag queen,” Ford adds, “which you’re not and again it’s a good job you’re not, because you’d put them out of business.”

Sheppard looks at him. “Glad to see you’re up and about.”

Ford smirks. “Looks like I’m not the only one.”

“Rodney! Come back, you know we don’t mean it. We’re only messin’ with ye mind.”

McKay ignores his lover’s cry. “I’m going to get changed!” He yells angrily.

“Ah, McKay the Dhaks are going to be sooo disappointed.” Sheppard teases.

“Yeah,” Ford says, joining in, “especially, after they requested for you. You don’t want to break their hearts now do you?”

Carson chuckles, before shooting off the log and darting after his lover.

“Did they not think any of you would be suitable?” Teyla asks.

John looks at Weir. “You know it’s a shame you didn’t bring your make-up bag, kit…or whatever you women call it these days,” Sheppard says, “because it would have really suited Rodney.”

Weir grins, amused. “Now would that be the bag or the make-up?”

“You don’t think we pushed it too far, do you?” Ford asks, his tone now serious.

“No, McKay knows we’re only messing.”

“He looked rather pissed off.”

Sheppard looks at Ford, before shrugging. “You know Rodney, always taking things out of content.”



Scene: McKay’s in a strop: angrily sitting on the bed, trying to removes his heels, but, alas no such luck.


Beckett enters the hut, only to get a moody and angry reception.

He walks over to his lover, dropping to his knees, as he takes Rodney’s foot into his hands. “Ah, Rodney, you do know that we’re only having a laugh. Where’s the harm in that?”

McKay looks at him with a dark, but hurtful expression. “Yeah, at my expense! I’m always the butt of people’s jokes, and I’m so fucking sick and tried of it! Why can’t you pick on Sheppard?!” He snarls. “Or is he just to pretty to pick on?” He snaps bitterly.

Beckett stands up, cupping his lover’s face. “Rodney-”

“Don’t!” He snaps, lying on the bed. “Just go back to “flyboy” and the others. I’m sure they’ll be delighted with my little outburst.”

Beckett sits on the edge of the bed. “I love you.”

“Is that supposed to make me feel better?” He says, again bitterly.

“Yes,” he says truthfully, “but it didna work.”

“Humph!”

Beckett’s eyebrows rise. “Is that a good ‘humph’ or a bad ‘humph’?”

“Humph!”

Beckett sighs, before removing his boots and socks. “Well, I don’t care what they say, I think you looked rather fetching in the outfit, tacky or not…and it’ll be a shame to let it go to waste.”

“You’re acting like its food.”

“No I’m not.”

McKay turns to face his lover. “Yes you are. You said ‘it’ll be a shame to let it go to waste’.”

Confusion washes over the Scottish doctor. “And?”

“And? You only use that terminology, to categorize food.”

“Not all the time.”

McKay pulls away, before tossing over. “Bugger off.”

“Excuse me?”

McKay sighs-slightly irritated. “What? I have to be British to use that term?”

Beckett snorts. “No.” He grins. “Say it again.”

“No!”

“Say it again, or we’re never having sex again.”

“Suits me fine!” McKay grumbles.

“Ah, Rodney, don’t be a spoilsport.”

McKay sighs- irritated. “Will it stop you bugging me?”

Beckett grins. “Yes.”

“Fine.” McKay grumbles sighing. “Bugger off, then! There are you happy, now?”

Beckett chuckles, unzipping his pants.

“Carson, go away.”

“You told me to ‘bugger off’ and that’s exactly what I’m doing.” Beckett states, as he removes his boxers and pants.

He places his boxers and pants neatly on the floor, before opening his bag and taking out the lubrication and condom.


McKay tosses over, he smiles in amusement. “I didn’t tell you to drop your pants…not that I mind.”

Beckett gets onto the bed, grinning, widely, allowing his eyes to fall onto his lover. “Oh, I thought you said we weren’t-”

McKay flashes him a sheepishly smile. “Can’t I change my mind…but first this outfit…”

A mischievous smile forms on the Scot’s lips. “Who says we have to remove it? Now…” his voice trails offs, as he rubs the lubrication on his cock, (immediately, his solider is at full attention), before rolling the condom on.

He slowly rolls Rodney’s skirt up-his grin, get bigger by the second, he stops, before lubricating his lover.

“Well, this’ll be interesting.” McKay mutters.

“Definitely.” The kneeling Scot says in agreement. “It’s a good thing you didn’t sit down, otherwise they’d have gotten an eyeful.”

Rodney grins in amusement, bringing his knees towards his chest, Carson enters slowly: Rodney knows that this means that Carson’s going to tease him.

And indeed he does, as he begins to thrust, slowly, briefly pausing, before restarting, and slowly increasing his pace.

Rodney’s eyes close, as a wide grin forms on his lips, enjoying the penetration.

Carson pauses again, this time longer, the skirt, slightly ticking him.

Rodney knows that this means that Carson wants to hear him beg.

No, I’m not going to do is this time, I’m not going to….. “Carson, please.” He pleads, opening his eyes.

Carson doesn’t oblige. “Please….” Rodney pleads again, this time throwing his “blue-eyed-puppy look”. “I would get on my knees, but….”

Rodney leans up, but Carson pushes him back, as soon, as his back hits the bed, pain shoots through him.

Carson chuckles, before obliging. He thrusts slowly and deeply, he repeats this motion a few times, before changing his rhythm: thrusting him fully and harder this time, again he repeats this motion a few times, before changing his pattern again, to his prior motion.

“Oh God….” Rodney utters, struggling for air.

As he slides his arms under Rodney’s knees, Carson lowers his face, smiling at his lover, closing his eyes, before kissing him.

Rodney cups the back of Carson’s head, kissing him back: fiercely, hungrily.

Rodney’s lips part, allowing his wet tongue to enter, Carson begins to explore his lover’s mouth.

As the thrusting continues, Rodney’s hands begin to wonder, across his lover’s torso, where he softly, begins to strum his sides.

As he continues to thrust harder and deeply, Carson continues to explore his lover’s mouth: sucking, swallowing Rodney’s moans, whilst also being sucked and having his moans swallowed.

His thrusts begin to cease, as he slightly withdraws, pulling away briefly, as he runs his tongue across Rodney’s lips and ears, before moving forward, briefly pausing in that positing.

He raises himself, before lifting Rodney’s legs and allowing him to wrap his legs across his shoulders.

Carson sits back down, before throwing his head back, facing the ceiling.

He begins to penetrate slowly and deeply.

“Oh, God, Carson….”

He continues with this motion for a while, and again Rodney moans and calls out his lover’s name.

Again Carson pauses, as takes hold of Rodney’s ankles, he leans forward, before lifting Rodney’s legs, hauling him upwards.

Rodney yelps in surprise.

He continues to thrust- deeper, harder, he begins to snarl.

As the penetration continues, yelps and moaning escapes the scientist’s lips.

Sensing his climax, Carson stops, waiting briefly, slowing his penetration, before climaxing and yelling out his lover’s name.

Rodney leans up, pulling him in for deep, meaningful kiss.


(Time-lapse)

He looks at his partner, as they make their way back.

“What?”

Beckett shrugs. “Nothing.”

“No, it can’t be nothing, you can’t give me that look and say it’s nothing.”

“Fine,” he stops cupping his lover’s face, “I haven’t a clue, how you roped me into this Rodney.”

McKay grins. “Ah, but, Carson, it looks much better on you, then it did me.”

Beckett grins, kissing him.

“And that eye shadow really suits you.”

Beckett pulls a face, before lacing his fingers with McKay’s. “Green is okay, I’d preferred blue though.”

They continue to walk, slowly.

“The pink suits you, although I still don’t understand why you didn’t go for the brighter shade.”

“Because, it was too bright and I prefer light colours.”

“Guess it’s a good thing Tera had a variety.”

“Aye, but, when we get back, I’m going to ask Elizabeth or Kate.”

McKay’s eyebrows rise, as a smirk breaks out. “You know you’re hurting Teyla’s feelings, by leaving her out.”

The Scot grins. “Don’t tell anyone this, but Elizabeth tends to borrow, Teyla’s, apparently she ran out and the Athosian has quite a collection.”

McKay smirks. “And what? Teyla hasn’t noticed her make-up disappearing?”

Beckett smirks. “Oh, she has, marks my words.”

McKay’s grin gets wider. “That’ll be interesting to watch. I mean women, can’t live without their make-up, shoes or clothes.”

“Like men and sports? Hockey, football or American football….”

“Soccer isn’t bad, if you like: David Beckham, Ruud van Nistelrooy, Thierry Henry or Michael Owen-”

Beckett grins. “I see you know your football.”

McKay, smiles, sheepishly. “Not really, I had to ask Grodin.”

“Really?”

“Yes.”

“I could always teach you about football…” he rolls his eyes, “I’m sorry, I mean soccer.”

McKay laughs. “Huh.”

“Huh? Huh, what?”

“I was just thinking: what do you think Elizabeth, Teyla, Kate and Milo would look like in each others clothes?”

Beckett snorts, he opens his mouth to speak, but Sheppard’s laughter prevents him.

“Sweet.”

McKay pulls a face. “Sweet? Why does Carson look ‘sweet’ and I look whack?”

Ford shrugs. “Because he does.”

“That shade doesn’t suit you.” Weir says.

“I told you.”

McKay throws his hands in the air, before mimicking his lover’s words. “And what colour would suit him?”

Weir looks at him, before shrugging.

McKay smirks. “I hear you have quite a collection Elizabeth.”

She looks at him darkly.

Beckett hits his lover hard, stopping him from opening his mouth again.

“Ah, Doctor McKay, my father would like a word with you.” Tera says, with an unreadable smile.

“Oooh, what’d you this time McKay?” Sheppard asks teasingly.

“Perhaps they want to honour him?” Teyla says hopefully.

Ford and Sheppard look at each other and burst into fits of laughter.

“For what?” Sheppard says, trying to control his laughter.

She looks at the Lieutenant Colonel, shrugging.

McKay says nothing, as he follows the young woman.

Sheppard watches, as McKay disappears, he gets out his notepad. “Now how many did you say?”

Weir grins. “Three.”

Sheppard says nothing, as he writes it down.

Ford snorts. “Wimp.”

Teyla laughs, looking at the woman sitting next to her. “I have to agree with you there Aiden.”

Aiden grins smugly at Weir.

Weir looks unimpressed, ready to reply, when the Athosian beats her.

“But is that all?” Teyla teases.

Her eyebrow arches. “Excuse me?”

“Three is rather a safe number.” She says, again teasing.

Beckett sits down, next to Sheppard. “Three what?”

Teyla smirks. “Are you afraid of losing Doctor Weir?”

Sheppard and Ford can’t help laughing.

Weir feels herself blush. “I didn’t see you betting.” She says matter-of-factly.

“That is because I did not have the chance.” She points out, before grinning. “I would like to bet a week’s worth.”

Ford chokes on his own laughter.

Sheppard’s eyebrow rises. “A week? Are you sure?”

Teyla looks at the diplomat, before smiling cockily. “I have every confidence that I will win, Colonel.”

Sheppard sighs. “Fine.” And again he writes it down. “Okay: Ford’s down for five, I’m down for two and three chocolate bars… Elizabeth’s being a wimp-”

“Hey!” She snaps.

Teyla snickers, again surprising Sheppard.

Sheppard grins. “Hay is for horses. Teyla’s the only one, who actually taking a risk.”

Teyla grins, smugly.

“And we’re not?” Ford asks.

“Well, yes, I guess we all are expect for Elizabeth.”

“Fine!” She sighs, rising her hands-surrendering. “I’ll bet the same as Aiden.”

Sheppard winks. “Ah, I knew it….” He crosses the number three out, before writing five down, by Weir’s name.

“Are you sure five is not too much Doctor Weir?” Teyla asks cockily.

Weir shoots her a dark look. “Bite me.”

Teyla says nothing, merely, flashing her, a devious smile, before leaning closer to the older woman. “That could be arranged.”

Weir looks at the younger in surprise, feeling herself blush, she looks away quickly.

“What’re ye betting on?” Beckett asks, not really sure if he wants to know the answer.

“On Rodney.” Ford says, with a full smirk.

“Rodney?”

“Yes.” Ford says smugly.

“Why?”

“Because we’re bored, that’s why.” Ford continues. “And we want to have fun. And, well, no offence doc, but you’re more boring then McKay…so, it’s much easier to bet on Rodney.”

Beckett pretends to look hurt. “I’m not boring. I just don’t have a death wish like you and John.” He pauses briefly. “So what does Rodney have to do exactly?”

Sheppard grins. “Ah, now, that’ll be telling and we wouldn’t want that now would we?”

Beckett pulls a face. “And the prize is coffee?”

“Yup.”

“But that’s not all.” Weir mutters-to quiet for Beckett to hear.

“Even though the coffee is vile?”

Sheppard places an arm around the Scot’s shoulder. “Ah, but have you tasted the Athosians coffee? Beautiful.”

“But we don’t have Athosian coffee.” He says, pointing out the obvious.

“But Teyla does.” Ford says.

“So let me get this straight.” He says, in amusement. “You, (he points to Sheppard), Ford (he points to Ford) and Elizabeth (he points to the diplomat) are betting our, vile coffee for Athosian coffee?” He turns his attention to the Athosian. “And you’re alright by this?”

Before Teyla can even reply, McKay remerges-holding a small, wooden statue.

“Well, I’ll be damned.” Sheppard mutters.

McKay grins. “I’ve just received an award for ‘best dressed’.” He looks at the statue, tracing the cravings. “Not bad, for someone who isn’t a natural or fails to have the qualities.”

“I told you.” Teyla says gleefully.

McKay walks, over to lover, whispering something in his ear, before walking off, only to have Beckett dart off after him, wearing a huge mischievous grin.

The four remaining watch, but say nothing.

After a moment’s worth of silence, Teyla’s the first to speak. “So, they chose Doctor McKay, because he is more…manly?”

Sheppard snorts. “Can you believe it?”

Teyla flashes him a cocky smile. “That means that he is manlier then you Colonel.” Teyla states, rather cockily.

Sheppard opens his mouth to speak, but Weir overtakes. “I guess you’re right there Teyla.”

Ford snickers. “I still can’t believe they gave him a wooden statue for…doing drag.”

“If they’d’ve asked me, I’d have done it and-” Sheppard says.

“No, you wouldn’t.” Weir says, matter-of-factly.

“Yes, I would have.” He protests.

“And destroy your good image?” Teyla says, with a hint of mischief. “I think not Colonel.”

Sheppard shoots her a look. “Hey!”

Weir smirks. “Hay is for horses John. You know, John I must say I am rather impressed, your cockiness has rubbed off very well.”

Teyla speaks again rather cockily. “If you would have done it, gone drag, as your people call it, the Dhaks would not have rewarded you.”

Ford can’t help laughing. “Yup, you’ve definitely done a great job. So does this mean that you and Teyla are going to compete against each other and see who’s cockier?”

“I know who I’d place my money on.” Weir says.

Sheppard’s lips twist; he crocks his head, completely ignoring Elizabeth’s and Aiden’s comments. “Are you saying that Rodney would beat me?”

“That is exactly what I am saying. He had the, as you would say…. ‘He had the balls’. The Dhaks asked you all did they not?”

Ford nods, as the Athosian continues. “And yet, you all refused….”

“McKay refused the most.” Sheppard says, like a child who’s throwing a strop and refuses to admit that they’re in the wrong.

“And yet he still took their challenge.”

Sheppard opens his mouth to say something, but nothing comes out: so instead he throws the Athosian a look.

“You know, now he’s won an award we’re never going to hear the end of this.” Ford points out.

“I can’t believe they gave him an award.” Sheppard grumbles.

Teyla grins, gleefully, again repeating her words. “I told you.”

Sheppard grumbles something.

“What was that John? Teyla’s what?”

He shoots Weir a look. “Nothing. You’re just hearing things must be a sign of old age.”

Weir scoffs. “If I’m old I’d dread to think what that makes you.” Before Sheppard can reply, she continues, this time turning her attention to the Athosian. “So are you sure you want to bet a week’s worth Teyla?”

The Athosian looks at the older woman. “Yes.”

“Even though, you’re going to lose?”

Teyla laughs. “What makes you think I’m going to lose Doctor Weir?”

She smirks, winking. “Call it a hunch.”

“Ye of little faith.” Shepard mutters.

Weir looks at Sheppard. “Oh, come on, the chance of Teyla or any of us, for that matter… getting Rodney to pole dance is rather slim.”

“There are ways and means.” Teyla says, rather slyly.

Weir looks at her curiously.

Teyla stands up. “In two days time, Doctor McKay will wear a dress and he will pole dance. And I will be crowned the winner.” She looks at Weir with an unreadable expression. “And one of you will get to be slave,” she grins, before looking around, “and I will do whatever I please with you, so, if I were you (again she looks at Weir) I would start to prepare myself for the worse.”

Surprisingly neither Sheppard nor Ford catches any of these exchanges.

She struts off, leaving behind three very confused people.

“I don’t like that sound of that.” Ford admits.

Sheppard smirks. “There’s no way she’ll win.”

“Try telling her that.” Weir says.

“But, say if she does, that’s not going to be good.” Ford says, somewhat nervously. “I mean I’ve seen the woman fight….”

“And this has what to do with being a slave?” Weir asks.

Ford smirks. “Well, let’s just say that I’d hate to get on the bad side of her.”

Sheppard, chuckles, before looking at the clueless diplomat. “You know if you win, who’s going to be your slave?”

She winks. “Wouldn’t you like to know.”

Sheppard smirks. “I have a pretty good idea.”

“Oh, really? Would you care to tell the rest of us?”

He looks at her smugly, before whispering the name in her ear. He watches, as she darkens. “See, I knew it.”

She laughs. “I plead the fifth.”

Sheppard snorts. “On what grounds? You’ve been watching too much of ‘The Practice’. And I’m pretty certain I know why, I mean Lara Flynn Boyle, is an attractive woman.”

Elizabeth laughs. “First of all, I don’t watch “The Practice” and even if I did, it certainly wouldn’t be because of a certain actor or actress and secondly-”

“No,” Sheppard says, mockingly, “you’d just prefer to watch shows like Star Trek, boring.”

“I’ve never watch Star Trek.”

“So what kind of shows do you watch?”

“None of your business.”

Sheppard pretends to look confused. “Nope, never heard of, who’s in it?”

Weir laughs, standing up. “I’m going to sleep.”

Sheppard grins, slyly. “Oh, I bet you are.”

She throws him a look. “Meaning?”

“Nothing, it’s just that there’s no doubt in my mind that you will get a good night’s sleep.” He says, again teasingly.

Weir grins sheepishly, but says nothing, as she walks off.

“Night. And don't forget to say night to Teyla.” Sheppard says, loudly.

He turns his attention to Ford, before scuffling closer. “If I win, guess who’ll be my slave?”

Ford shrugs. “Teyla?”

Sheppard snorts. “No. Plus, er, Elizabeth would kill me.”

Ford looks at him confused. “Why?”

“Well, let’s just say that I’m pretty certain that she’d prefer Teyla to train her instead of Dex or myself.”

“Because?” He looks at him even more bewildered.

“Why do you think?”

“Because she needs to learn to fight, in case she goes off-world again?”

Sheppard grins, in amusement. “Okay, I’m going to say this once and once only: If it was up to Weir she’d get Teyla to train her.”

Ford feels himself blush.

Shepard sighs. “Okay I’m going to make this easy for the both of us: if it was to Elizabeth and Teyla, was to train her, it would be in the bedroom.”

Ford looks at him, briefly confused. “Oh? Oh! No! No way!”

Sheppard grins. “Yes way.”

“Seriously? Weir and Teyla? When the hell did that happen?”

“It hasn’t. She’s had a thing for Teyla, since, late last year, but, because she was still with Simon, she didn’t do anything. But, when we went back to Earth, a few months ago, she’d found out that Simon had…y’know moved on. And for her, that was the ultimate betrayal….Simon was her life and he just moved on, just like that. I’m not sure if she told him, she never told me, but she’s ready to move I just don’t think she knows it.”

Sheppard shrugs, as he continues. “And Teyla is quite a catch…for her.” He adds, quickly. "Of course I wouldn't mind playing cupid, with the pair of them, but Elizabeth would kill me.” He smirks in amusement. “No doubt she’d want to hit on her in her own time…"

Ford smiles, lowering his head, he’s missed so much…and he can’t help wondering if he’s missed his window of opportunity with John.

He’s never believed in love-at-first-sight. Always believed it to be a crock, until that moment, until that very moment, when he first laid eyes on one Major John Sheppard. But of course, he’s never confronted Sheppard about it. It’s the only thing he’s been too afraid to do. And now, now it’s too late…



Sheppard looks at him. “Aiden?”

Ford says nothing, as Sheppard brings his chin up. “I’m sorry.”

Ford holds the Colonel’s sadden gaze. “For?”

“For what the wraith did to you, for what you went through.”

He smiles faintly, saying nothing.

“I-”

Ford decides to change the subject. He doesn’t want to talk about what happened, it’s bad enough that he still has nightmares.

And as for this Dex guy? He doesn’t know what to make of him, all he knows is that he’s been on the run from the Wraith for years…but other than that, he’s never really bothered to speak to him and why should he? But one thing’s for certain he hates the fact that he’s formed a bound with John.

“You never told me your answer.”

Sheppard looks at him, puzzled. “Answer?”

“Who’d be your slave?”

Sheppard grins, sheepishly. “Oh, that.”

“Yes that.”

He holds Ford’s gaze, leaning in slightly. “Can’t you tell?”

“No. I have been known to act like a blonde at times.”

Sheppard laughs. “I’ll give you a clue.”

“Bates?”

Sheppard chokes. “What? Are you insane?”

He shrugs. “I told you I’m not very good at puzzles.” He bites his lip. “Dex?”

Sheppard snorts. “Again are you insane?”

Ford sighs-relieved. So there is nothing going on with them…

Sheppard grins.

“So are you going to give me a clue?”

Sheppard cups Ford’s face, leaning in close-his nose touching Aiden’s. “Nope.”

Ford grins. “Not even a little clue?”

“Nope.”

“Bite me.”

“Bite you?” Sheppard smiles. “I’d rather kiss you first.”

Ford’s lips press against Sheppard’s. “Looks like I beat you to it”

“Looks like it.” Sheppard mutters, before reclaiming the younger man’s lips.

"And you know you could be my cupid any day. After you've sorted out Elizabeth and Teyla, I mean I wouldn't want you to be disappointed.”

“You could never disappoint me Aid.” Sheppard mutters, before shutting up the younger man, with a deep kiss.


END