"Absence" by Nu Hiep [38 Minutes Challenge]

[nuhiep.livejournal.com]

Title: Absence
Author: Nu Hiep
Rating: Gen
Notes: Thanks to covertpurin for beta.

Summary: This is a team-centric drabble that focuses on the relationships that the team has with Sheppard.



They're different when he's not around.

Teyla smiles more. Her eyes are sly, slanted. She glances out of the corners of her eyes, face lowered and tilted at an angle.

Ronon slouches. He has an almost laugh that sounds like a whumph of air. Sometimes he shows his teeth, not a smile or a grimace.

Rodneys is still Rodney. He is ever true to his enlightened self-interest, but he too is subtly different. He talks less if that is possible, one or two syllables here and there, dropped like crumbs and stones. He is more truculent, but means it even less than usual.

When he's gone, they fight like siblings. They squabble over who gets the last powerbar. Ronon always wins, because he just eats it before the other two can reach it. It's stuffed in his bulging cheek while Rodney waves his hands and threatens to die of starvation, his wonderful, indispensable brain poisoned slowly by ketoacidosis. Teyla bites her cheek instead, because protesting would make her sound too much like Rodney.

Off world - when he's gone to check the perimeter or trapped in a tower playing stud to the latest brood mare - they play games. There's the game to see who can annoy Rodney first. If Ronon feels like winning, he'll just pick something up off the ground and eat it while Rodney is looking. Teyla purses her lips and won't accuse him of cheating, but Ronon hears it all the same. He refuses to stop, because she's developed a trick of her own. It involves praising the native people, their culture and technological achievements. Teyla and Ronon have yet to decide whose trick is dirtier.

Rodney votes for Teyla, personally.

When he's not looking, when he ranges ahead of them, eyes towards the horizon tracking movement under the dark lenses of his aviator sunglasses, they often argue in a silent, shared language. Glances exchanged, shifting from foot to foot - they discuss with uncanny precision the matters of the day. Some days Rodney is the voice of moral reason, speaking of the dangers of colonial imperialism in the impatient flutter of his fingers. Ronon will roll his shoulders back in response, urging them to take the path of necessity. They will both glance at Teyla, walking in between them, because it will be her turn to decide.

None of this really matters, of course. When he is around, they don't exchange irritated glances, don't argue, don't acknowledge each other. He is the axle and they the spokes of a wheel. They look to him and, without thinking, adapt themselves to his expectations regardless of his wishes. He is their leader. That is his nature - to expect - and by extension it is theirs to comply. Because when he's not around, he can't hear the games friends play, can't see the fights that siblings have, can't know the work teams do.

In the end it doesn't matter.

Because he can't see it and none of it really exists.

Comments

[revelininsanity.livejournal.com]

Whoa. Lovely, but I feel very sad for Sheppard.

[nuhiep.livejournal.com]

Thank you.

[spike21.livejournal.com]

beautiful and lonely. really nice take on the dynamic of the Team.

[nuhiep.livejournal.com]

Thanks. I was really inspired by The Tower and how we see the rest of the team interacted without Sheppard's presence.

[tazzles.livejournal.com]

Nice, but kind of sad at the same time.

[nuhiep.livejournal.com]

Thank you for your feedback. I really hadn't expected this kind of reaction.

[teawith.livejournal.com]

Oh, poor John! And he doesn't even know what he's missing! So beautiful though - for such a tiny ficlet, it really sucked me in.

[nuhiep.livejournal.com]

^_^ Thanks.

[kellifer-fic.livejournal.com]

Wow... that's really lovely.

[nuhiep.livejournal.com]

Thank you.

[toniabarone.livejournal.com]

Wow. Um. Wow. *blinks* I can't get more out. Loved it. And the dig about "The Tower".

[nuhiep.livejournal.com]

Hehe. "The Tower." ^_^ I can't tell whether I hate or love that episode.

[eretria.livejournal.com]

Brilliant. Wistful and lonely and still brimming with human warmth, but in retrospect all in hues of blue and silver. It's a bit like the girl with the matches in the fairy tale - always looking in and seeing the wonders, but never able to step inside. Beautiful.

[nuhiep.livejournal.com]

Thank you. It was blue and silver for you? Interesting. You're very perceptive. I write each story with a color in mind. For this one, I was personally thinking pale yellow and green, a little gray and worn like grass bleached out by heavy Texas sun. I'm always interested in how people recieve the story. Did they see what I saw? Did they feel what I felt?

[maisierita.livejournal.com]

Wow, for a short piece, that really packed a punch.

Powerful and lovely, but it made me hurt for Sheppard, because he'll never be a part of it, and doesn't even know what he's missing.

[nuhiep.livejournal.com]

I'm glad you liked it.

[torakowalski.livejournal.com]

Ooh. That's really cool and beautiful. Lovely piece and a clever idea.

[nuhiep.livejournal.com]

Thank you very much.

[slashfictionfan.livejournal.com]

That was lovely..

I do feel sorry for John as he's missing such great aspects of his team's characters... "Teyla smiles more. Her eyes are sly, slanted." and "they often argue in a silent, shared language."

I know that it's the 'curse' of a leader to be somewhat apart from their team, as it wouldn't work otherwise, but this shows some of the cost of that... so in that way, I find it has the air of melancholy.

Such a lovely piece, thank you.

[nuhiep.livejournal.com]

Thanks! John has always been a problematic character for me. I'm really ambivalent towards him, because I've had a hard time understanding his motivations, getting under his skin. I've always felt that no matter how people attempt to reach out to him (like Rodney), John has a really hard time reaching back. I wonder sometimes if this isolation isn't more self-imposed that we think, that being the leader is an excuse.

[slashfictionfan.livejournal.com]

'Self imposed isolation' - yeh, could be.. or a vicious circle once started so long ago, now nearly impossible to stop.
I've never had as much love for John as Rodney as he doesn't seem as rounded or fleshed out as he could be, although I guess that helps fic writers who can do the fleshing out themselves (did not mean for that to sound so dirty *g*).

[zellieh]

I'd be really interested to see this as the first of four stories, because I can see this idea working for each character:
I can see the Team acting more like warriors when Rodney's not there.
They'd be more boyish without Teyla. More relaxed, because they don't have to show off in front of the girl, maybe.
Without Ronon...more like a family, because he's still the new guy, but with the ghost of Ford in the air.
I liked it a lot. It made me think about the team dynamics. Thank you.

[nuhiep.livejournal.com]

Wow.

That's a really great idea!

I hadn't thought about that. When I wrote this piece, it was really only an attempt to understand John, but this theme would definitely work in series. I'll definitely play with it and see what happens. If I can get the voices to come out right, I'll definitely post it.

Thanks!

[nuhiep.livejournal.com]

Thanks. I'm glad you liked it.

[nuhiep.livejournal.com]

PS: I love your icon.

[springwoof.livejournal.com]

Very clever, very insightful!
wags,springwoof

[nuhiep.livejournal.com]

Thanks. ^_^

[adannu.livejournal.com]

This is really nice -- but I'm sad for John, who would pretend not to press his nose and fingertips to the glass if it were there, but it's not there, so he doesn't. If you do write matching pieces for the other members of the team, I would totally read them.

[nuhiep.livejournal.com]

*laughs* That imagery is cute. I will do my best with the other fics. I'll definitely put them up if they work out.

[dzurlady.livejournal.com]

When he's not looking, when he ranges ahead of them, eyes towards the horizon tracking movement under the dark lenses of his aviator sunglasses, they often argue in a silent, shared language. Glances exchanged, shifting from foot to foot - they discuss with uncanny precision the matters of the day. Some days Rodney is the voice of moral reason, speaking of the dangers of colonial imperialism in the impatient flutter of his fingers. Ronon will roll his shoulders back in response, urging them to take the path of necessity. They will both glance at Teyla, walking in between them, because it will be her turn to decide.

Very cool.

[nuhiep.livejournal.com]

Thanks!