Hook, Line, Sinker by Giddy for the Shark!challenge, by way of Amnesty

[giddygeek.livejournal.com]

Title: Hook, Line, Sinker
Author: giddygeek
Spoilers: Nothing that hasn't aired in the US.
Notes: 2900 words for the shark challenge, yay amnesty! Thanks to terrio, astolat and cesperanza, who very kindly read this through for me.



All in all, Mato wasn't a bad place to visit, just weird. The people were friendly, but they wore an awful lot of clothing considering the almost tropical weather, they had a thing against shoes, and then there were the strange customs like drugging unsuspecting visitors.

"No true friendship goes untested," Ehani said very seriously as he adjusted the tiny knobs of the heart rate monitor Rodney had reluctantly strapped on.

"Oh, no?" Rodney tilted his chin back and fidgeted, shifting his weight from one bare foot to the other and visibly fighting the urge to get the hell away from Ehani, the village, and quite possibly the entire planet. "How do we get to test your friendship then, hmm? Perhaps if we shot--"

"McKay!" John said, cuffing him lightly on the back of the head, smiling at Ehani like oh, that Rodney--seriously, though, he's just kidding! It was a smile he had to use a lot.

"I'm just saying it's not a good test," Rodney said, glaring at John. "If I stop moving, I get a painful rash–that's just stupid. And what am I supposed to do, walk in circles around the village square? Oh, that'll be a test of endurance; can one mind bear that much stimulation? Look, a rock! Look, a house. Look, a rock! Ow!"

"The monitor is working," Ehani said, stepping back and bowing to Rodney, a tight smile on his lips. Rodney scowled at him and rubbed the place where Teyla had pinched him. "Come. I will show you where you will walk."

Rodney motioned for Ehani to lead the way. "Lava field," he said to John, who walked beside him, Teyla and Ronon following, the rest of the villagers trailing behind them. "Cess pit. Goo that never comes off. Thorns. Vicious animals."

John blinked at him. "Goo that never comes off?"

"And reeks!" Rodney said. "Just wait and see!"

~~~~~

"Oh," Rodney said, as they walked over the last hill and saw the ocean, spread out for miles in front of them. "Huh."

John was already in love. It was a natural harbor, with a wide, sandy white beach and gently lapping waves. The two moons were nearly full and hung low and fat in the sky, spangling light on the water. There was a gentle breeze, and the whole place smelled like salt water and flowers. Beside him, Teyla sighed, and even Ronon grunted appreciatively.

"Sea monsters!" Rodney said.

John turned his head to stare. "Are you serious?"

"What!" Rodney said defensively. "Come on, you know there has to be something. Right? Right?"

Ehani coughed. "We allow new friends to walk here during their time of trial to convince them that Mato is a place worthy of their efforts. There are no...monsters."

"This place is worthy," John said, watching the water again. "Very, very worthy. Well, c'mon Rodney, let's go."

"The walker is usually alone," Ehani said doubtfully.

John rested his hands on his P90 and raised his eyebrows. "Some sort of rule about it? Taboo, tradition, whole deal down the tubes if Rodney's not alone?"

Ehani shook his head.

"Good," John said. "Teyla, Ronon, you guys stay with the villagers while we walk, okay? We don't have to make this a big group thing, but I'm sure Ehani understands that we'd be very reluctant to let our drugged friend wander in the dark for hours on an unfamiliar planet without company. Very reluctant." He smiled at Ehani, who stepped back, then bowed again.

"I understand," he said, eyes on the P90. "But we must ask that you remove your footwear. The sands are not to be spoiled with dust from the long roads."

"Not a problem." John stripped off his boots and socks and handed them to Ronon. The night air was warm, and the sand looked like velvet in the moonlight.

"You can tell us more of your stories," Teyla said, smiling at Ehani from under her lashes. "Come, let us return to the table." She nodded at John, then turned back down the path towards the village.

Ronon waited till all the stragglers were gone, Teyla and Ehani like pied pipers at the head of the procession. "Guns are ready," he said. "We'll keep our eyes open."

"Good." John looked at Rodney, who was frowning at the beach, his hand fiddling with the device strapped to his neck. "We'll keep you informed," John said and Ronon nodded, thumped Rodney on the back in what was probably meant to be a supportive gesture, and walked away.

"That's so going to bruise," Rodney said, wincing as he rolled his shoulders. Then his eyes went wide; the monitor was beeping faintly. "Oh--Sheppard--"

"Come on," John said, and headed for the shore. "You'll be fine once we start moving."

Rodney stumbled clumsily behind him. "Rabid sand fleas!" he said, and John just had to laugh.

~~~~~

"I can't believe I'm strolling down the beach barefoot in the moonlight and there isn't even an easily-seducible blonde within miles of me," Rodney said. "This is such a waste!"

John looked at him. Strolling could hardly describe what Rodney was doing, which was more of a slow, barefoot stomp, with a bit of lurch thrown in. He refused to walk on the hard-packed sand closer to the water. There had been something about jellyfish in his last rant, and giant poisonous crabs in the rant before that. Next up would be knife-wielding starfish, John was fairly certain. It had been that kind of day.

"We've been walking for fifteen minutes," he pointed out. "At this rate that's, what, barely a mile from the village. Not so far from the easily seducible blondes, McKay, they just knew better."

Rodney sniffed. "Oh, certainly. And I suppose that in the few minutes when I wasn't watching, a horde of young and nubile village women threw their massive woolen undergarments at you?"

John shrugged. "I wouldn't say it was a horde, exactly."

"Oh, that is just typical," Rodney said, stomping harder. "Me, they drug, you, they seduce. That's it, I don't want to trade with these people anymore. Let's go home."

John reached out and snagged Rodney's arm. "Knock it off," he said firmly. "No one threw massive woolen undergarments at me when you weren't looking. I was teasing you. Let's just walk, okay?"

"I don't want to walk. I want to go back to Atlantis. I don't see why we still bother with people who drug us or make us go through their stupid rituals, or both. It's like an endless game of Double Dare, and all we're ever going to win is trouble!"

"Except in this round, we're going to win those antibiotics Carson wants, the weatherproof liner that's good for 70-below-zero temperatures, and that tea you like." John tapped the display screen of the little device Rodney was wearing around his neck; it was meant to be worn loose, like a necklace, but Rodney had freaked out and tightened it so the monitor was right over his pulse point. "You're slowing down," he said. "C'mon."

~~~~~

"I promise to stand between you and the fish with laser eyes," he finally said after another half hour of Rodney cursing and struggling through the deep, loose sand of the beach. "You're going to wear yourself out too fast if you keep that up."

"I'm already worn out," Rodney said, and he looked it. They'd had a long day of hiking before they got to the village, and then a long evening of feasting, and then Ehani had given Rodney the heart rate reader and explained why.

Then had come the yelling. Understandable, really, but throwing an explosive fit was the worst thing Rodney could have done before he had to move around for eight hours or risk being affected by the drug in his system.

John didn't mention that, though. He just sighed, walked across the sand, and herded McKay towards the water with a hand on his back.

"If large sea beasts come up to the shore and drag us to their underwater lairs, I will never forgive you," Rodney muttered.

John touched his neck, patted his shoulder. "I wouldn't expect you to," he said, and walked between Rodney and the water.

~~~~~

"This is much easier," Rodney said after an unprecedented half hour of silence. "But I'm still exhausted."

"Too bad, Rodney," John said, because sometimes tough love was really the only thing that worked. "What do you want to do, just stop walking?"

"Yes," Rodney said, because sometimes tough love backfired. He walked towards the dry sand, and then he thumped down and fell over backwards, staring up into the night sky.

"Rodney." John stood above him, arms crossed over his chest. "You hate getting sand in your hair."

"I hate a great number of things," Rodney said. "But most of all, I hate walking on this beach. I am going to stay right where I am until the monitor beeps and then I will consider moving, or lying here motionless until I die, like a shark. Oh, then maybe I can come back and haunt the beach and eat the villagers when they go swimming."

"Rodney. You're not going to die if you don't move. You might--might--get a rash."

Rodney sniffed and didn't look at him. "If that's how you're going to be about it, you can go surf for all I care."

John sighed, then knelt in the sand. He pushed Rodney's head back and checked the numbers on the monitor; not bad. The ritual didn't require target heart rate or anything, just a small elevation. Rodney could lie there for a little while without the thing beeping at him, anyway.

"Maybe if you moved while you were lying there," he said. "I don't know. Do some crunches or something."

Rodney smacked John's hand away from his neck. "Maybe I'll masturbate," he said to the sky. "That'll get the blood flowing, won't it?"

John sat back on his heels. "For six hours?"

"I could do it. You know I could. And if you wanted, you could help," Rodney said.

"Hey, I signed up for a moonlit walk on the beach, not for putting out," John said, raising his eyebrows. "What kind of guy do you think I am?"

Rodney snorted. "The kind who puts out for a moonlit walk on the beach," he said.

"Yeah, well, okay," John said, because it wasn't exactly untrue, was it? He already had a hand on Rodney's stomach, after all, his fingers sliding under the waistband of Rodney's pants. "But you're even more hopeless. You put out for candy." He looked at the monitor for confirmation of what he already knew; there was Rodney's heart rate, speeding up.

"I'm easy," Rodney agreed. "In fact, you probably owe me a few. Plus you'd probably be saving my life here."

John grinned at him. "Fine," he said, and went to work on getting Rodney out of his pants. "But don't count on that line working every time, McKay."

Rodney gasped, arching up as John wrapped his hand around Rodney's dick, already half-hard. "I don't have to count on a line," he panted, his hand over John's encouraging him to move faster, harder. That wasn't untrue either, but it was never a good idea to let Rodney get too smug, so John leaned over him and kissed him. There was no better way to shut him up.

~~~~~

Rodney really did hate getting sand in his hair. In fact, he hated the feeling of sand on his skin anywhere. John would have counted it as just one of his many eccentricities, except he knew for a fact that Rodney was ridiculously sensitive. All it took was a little friction in the right place, a little heat, a little moisture and he was begging for more; an unexpected scrape, the wrong kind of pressure, a certain degree of chill and he was miserable.

They didn't have their packs so there was nothing to spread beneath them, no change of clothing, no way John could convince him to get more than halfway out of his uniform. Even then Rodney threatened him with many dire fates like John's coffee being mixed with the weird mold Teyla ate on toast, or Ronon being given the passwords to John's computer, until John laughed and rolled to let him climb on top.

After that, it got vaguely frustrating. Rodney did a lot of moving, "That is the point, isn't it?" he muttered in John's ear as he ground their hips together; he bit the corner of John's jaw and thrust against him, sweet pressure in all the right places--but not enough. There were zippers in the way sometimes, which made John vow that they would never, ever do this in any degree of clothed ever again.

But eventually John gave up on trying to rush it, and got into Rodney's slower, intense pace, the seemingly random touches that made him feel lit up from the inside. Rodney's hand on his cheek, Rodney's stomach sliding against his where their shirts had been pushed up, the solid power of Rodney's legs between his. It was less like sex and more like hours of making out, which John hadn't done since he was a teenager, even taking Rodney's love of a slow pace into account.

When John finally came, it was almost like an accident. He said, "Oh," jerked his hips and dropped his head back into the sand, panting, only dimly aware of Rodney groaning into his neck and coming wet and hot against him.

~~~~~

The monitor beeped. John pushed at Rodney's shoulders until Rodney was sitting up, straddling him, his palms flat on the ground and his head hanging down.

"Why couldn't they have sent us to a nice, grassy meadow?" he asked, rocking his hips. "We could've gotten naked in a meadow."

John slid his hands down Rodney's sides, over the soft flesh at his waist, dug his fingertips into the solid curve of his ass under his boxers and pants. Too many layers of clothes between them, really, but it still felt damn good, and a little extra pressure got Rodney moving fast enough to shut the monitor up.

"Bugs," John said, imagining a nice, grassy meadow from Rodney's point of view. "Bug shit. Animal shit. Pollen. Poisonous leaves. Sharp leaves. Leaves that smell funny. Twigs, sticks, branches, eerily creaking trees--"

"Right, okay, this is good," Rodney said, and leaned down to kiss him.

~~~~~

The instant the monitor went dead, indicating the last of the drugs were out of Rodney's system, he said "Oh, thank you," kissed John one more time, and fell asleep. John stayed up, just in case, watching Rodney's eyelashes flutter as he dreamed, running his hand up and down Rodney's side, touching his back and his hip.

But when the sun rose, John shook Rodney awake. As usual, Rodney came alert as fast as he'd fallen asleep, although he looked exhausted. Long night, John thought, but he couldn't help grinning.

"When we get back to Atlantis, we're taking the longest shower ever, and then we're sleeping for a week," Rodney said, which meant that he'd be taking a ten minute shower and a thirty minute nap; he'd be out the door again before John had even finished drying his hair. They brushed each other off, hands maybe lingering a little in places they normally wouldn't, but who was there to judge? and trudged back up the beach to the village path.

Ehani met them at the top. "You are well," he said, smiling. "I take it the ordeal was not as terrible as you had imagined?"

"I hate sand," Rodney said. "I really, really hate sand. And if you ever come to meet us somewhere, you can expect a hazing like--"

"It wasn't bad," John said, bumping Rodney with his shoulder. "We survived, anyway."

Ehani wasn't listening. He had looked past them to the beach, and tilted his head. "You did not walk very far."

John looked over his shoulder. From the top of the hill, he could see their tracks, marching off to one side of the harbor, distance between them gradually tapering, until there was the disturbed spot where Rodney had stopped walking. Their tracks marching back, closer together than before. The other half of the beach was completely pristine.

"Sit ups," Rodney said, eyes wide and cheeks flushed. "I, uh, decided it would be far less arduous to spend the rest of the night working on my abs--anyway."

Ehani looked at them.

"It got the job done," John said, shrugging, his hand on his mouth to hide his smile.

"Indeed," Ehani said. It might just have been the sun rising over the water, but there was a definite twinkle in his eyes. He clapped his hands together and cleared his throat, then gestured for them to follow him. "Well, friends, after making it through the long night, you are probably in great need of a meal."

"You have no idea," Rodney grumbled. "No drugs this time, all right?"

"Only a mild aphrodisiac," Ehani said. "I see you are amused! Your friend Ronon taught me about your jokes, I confess I found them quite strange but--"

"That's it," Rodney said, throwing up his hands. "Next time, Ronon is so getting the ritual."

~~~~~

Comments

[umbo.livejournal.com]

Nice job!

[giddygeek.livejournal.com]

Thank you very much! :)