Lost in Waiting by Lacey McBain, NC-17 [Virgin]

[laceymcbain.livejournal.com]

Title: Lost in Waiting
Author: Lacey McBain
Pairing: McKay/Sheppard
Rating: NC-17
Word Count: ~14,800 (I know!!)
Timeline: Set vaguely in the middle of S2 - definitely post-Runner, but with references to S1.
Summary: "You can’t have it both ways, Colonel. If you haven’t had any relationships, either you’re having the occasional one-night stand or you’re not having sex at all.”
Disclaimer: SGA doesn't belong to me. But you already knew that.
Author Notes:: torakowalski said she'd really like to see a realistic Virgin!John fic, and I got to thinking about it and couldn't stop. I tried my very best. This is for her.

On my webpage because it was too big for one post. Oops.

Lost in Waiting

Feedback makes me happy - multiple times. *G*

ETA: A huge thank you to everyone for reading and commenting. This is the most response I've ever had on a fic, and it's overwhelming in the best possible way. I usually respond to all comments, but I don't think I'll be able to this time, although I'll try to get to as many as possible. Thank you so much. ~Lacey

Comments

[ancientreader]

I've read this story twice now and both times I broke down crying at the moment when Rodney says "By crush I mean love."

Of course it would be Rodney who gets past John's defenses.

Thanks so much for this.

[moonflower75.livejournal.com]

I know this is pretty late, since you wrote this story in 2006, but I have only just come across it and I am floored by how beautiful your fic is.
I love the way you alternate between past and present to reveal a tidbit more of John every time, and that Rodney in your hands is perfectly spot on.
And even though I was already in love with your writing halfway through the story, this passage simply melted my heart and 'sealed the deal', so to speak

“I won’t push you. I swear, I won’t, and that completely goes against my nature, you know.” John grins at that, but doesn’t open his eyes. Rodney’s fingers are stroking lightly along the edge of his face, and it’s comfortable, not overwhelming, and John feels a familiar warmth spreading through his veins. “But, if you want more, if you want to work on giving up that personal shield you’ve been trapped behind all your life—”

“In-vul-ner-able,” John sing-songs, and Rodney laughs, pressing his forehead against John’s.

“Yes, Mr. Invulnerable, if you’re ready to let that go, I’d like to be the person who—”

“So help me God, if the word ‘deflower’ comes out of your mouth, Rodney—”

“—you can let go with. I’d like to be the one you can let go with. That’s all.”

John feels the shift when Rodney leans closer, recognizes the soft press of lips, so fleeting he could’ve imagined them.

“John, you have to know I’ve had a little crush on you since the day you lit up Antarctica.”

“And by little you mean huge?” John asks, finally letting his eyes open. He can’t help but smile, and Rodney’s smiling back, cautious but hopeful. John can’t imagine not wanting to believe Rodney can make everything right for him.

“No, by crush I mean love.”

“Oh,” John says.

“Oh.”

'deflower'...*snooooort* what's not to love? :D
thank you so much for sharing, I hope you won't mind if I add you to my friends'list, but in case you do, just let me know and I will undo it :)

[fish-echo.livejournal.com]

I just re-found this fic, and it's just as good on the re-read. Excellent.

[takemychance.livejournal.com]

Ohmygosh, this was fantastic. I loved how you fleshed-out John and his backstory, and I loved how tender Rodney was.

[gottalovev.livejournal.com]

oh wow, poor John. the worst thing is that he thinks it's all on him, when he never did anything wrong. I've always seen him on the show as a rather asexual being, so this fits for me in more ways than one. That Rodney is so understanding and awesome just makes it better. lovely.

[vicki_rae.livejournal.com]

This is beautiful, just beautiful.

[rhiaa.livejournal.com]

I've read this several times and the line "It was bitterly cold and John thought they should have let her wear the pink fuzzy slippers instead of the uncomfortable-looking shoes with the square black heels, but his father had said, “Don’t be stupid, John,” and he hadn’t even had the chance to say he just wanted her to be warm." Just breaks my heart every time, but “No, by crush I mean love.” fixes it :)

[ladyhalbourne]

Very beautifully written!

[captanddeastar.livejournal.com]

I first read this story a while ago, before I had an LJ to comment with, and coming back to it now, it's just as much of a gut-punch - and somehow, just as sweet - as I remembered. Thank you for sharing!

[devo79.livejournal.com]

Loved it so much.