Foul Is The Guest by owleyes_arisen
Aug. 20th, 2006 11:11 pm![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
owleyes-arisen.livejournal.com posting in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png){kind=small}
sga_flashficDid I get here first?
Title: Foul Is the Guest aka the Haiku Report
Author: owleyes_arisen
Pairing: None
Challenge: Mission Report
Summary: The day Elizabeth received Colonel Sheppard's mission report as a series of Haiku. He must have been very bored.
Notes: The title actually comes from a poem I once read.
Colonel Sheppard must have reached a new low for boredom when he sent in his report.
***
Mission Report on MX-39R4:
Team Leader: John Sheppard
Scientific Advisor: Rodney McKay
Native Guide/Diplomat: Teyla Emmagen
Heavy Lifter: Ronon Dex
Went to the planet.
Nothing to report.
McKay wants a pay increase
He insists it is
Due recompense for
Mental trauma, the origin
Lying with all us
“Moronic half-wits”
Who mistake power couplings
For blenders, disco
Balls for ZPMs
And insanity
For brilliance.
Please, may I hit him?
I promise it will
Raise morale in Atlantis.
***
Frankly, Elizabeth was just relieved that it hadn't been origami.
Title: Foul Is the Guest aka the Haiku Report
Author: owleyes_arisen
Pairing: None
Challenge: Mission Report
Summary: The day Elizabeth received Colonel Sheppard's mission report as a series of Haiku. He must have been very bored.
Notes: The title actually comes from a poem I once read.
Colonel Sheppard must have reached a new low for boredom when he sent in his report.
***
Mission Report on MX-39R4:
Team Leader: John Sheppard
Scientific Advisor: Rodney McKay
Native Guide/Diplomat: Teyla Emmagen
Heavy Lifter: Ronon Dex
Went to the planet.
Nothing to report.
McKay wants a pay increase
He insists it is
Due recompense for
Mental trauma, the origin
Lying with all us
“Moronic half-wits”
Who mistake power couplings
For blenders, disco
Balls for ZPMs
And insanity
For brilliance.
Please, may I hit him?
I promise it will
Raise morale in Atlantis.
***
Frankly, Elizabeth was just relieved that it hadn't been origami.
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
(no subject)
Date: 2006-08-21 06:56 am (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2006-08-21 06:58 am (UTC)But haiku follow a 5-7-5 syllable format and all of yours go 5-5-7.
Still really clever. They make actual sense, where as most people just stop when they run out of syllables.
(no subject)
Date: 2006-08-21 07:02 am (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2006-08-21 07:05 am (UTC)While it's true that the syllable pattern of the haiku is a bit off, somehow it's even funnier (and true to character) that Sheppard would have written it in haiku but gotten it slightly wrong.
(no subject)
Date: 2006-08-21 08:07 am (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2006-08-21 12:50 pm (UTC)Plus, Elizabeth must have loved it...it's infinitely better than the standard Mission Report.
**and origmai--I wonder what he would have submitted for that?*smile*
Totally original..loved it!!!
(no subject)
Date: 2006-08-21 12:53 pm (UTC)WP
(no subject)
Date: 2006-08-21 01:00 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2006-08-21 01:13 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2006-08-21 03:01 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2006-08-21 03:44 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2006-08-21 03:54 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2006-08-21 05:48 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2006-08-21 06:29 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2006-08-21 06:42 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2006-08-21 07:36 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2006-08-21 10:02 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2006-08-21 11:05 pm (UTC)Nothing to report.
McKay wants a pay increase
Ahahahha. Okay, yay, finally I get to ENJOY the fruits of this challenge--rock! Hilarious! (I have an affinity for bored haiku!)
(no subject)
Date: 2006-08-21 11:09 pm (UTC)Went to the planet.
Nothing to report.
McKay wants a pay increase
I really can just totally see John writing this. ♥
(no subject)
Date: 2006-08-21 11:57 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2006-08-22 03:04 am (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2006-08-22 04:41 am (UTC)And on the origami front? I have a vague recollection from high school of folding my paper for an essay into a hat, and writing my essay on it, and handing it in as such...
(no subject)
Date: 2006-08-22 07:46 am (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2006-08-22 02:09 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2006-08-22 04:08 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2006-08-24 11:32 pm (UTC)(Oh God, I think I just gave myself an idea...)
(no subject)
Date: 2006-08-26 06:31 pm (UTC)