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Sep. 23rd, 2006 11:18 pm![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
yolsaffbridge.livejournal.com posting in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png){kind=small}
sga_flashficTitle: Good Advice
Author:![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
yolsaffbridge & laura_redcloud
Pairing: Ronon/Elizabeth(???!!!!), McKay/Sheppard implied
Rating: Um, pretty much PG.
Wordcount: 1360
Summary: "He asked me if I was dying," Elizabeth whispered hoarsely.
Notes: We are very, very, very sorry to introduce ourselves to the fandom in this way.
After everyone else had left the meeting, John paused in the door. "Just out of curiosity..."
"Yes, John?" Elizabeth didn't look up from the pressing work with which she had immediately busied herself as the team filed out of her office.
"Is there a reason Ronon wasn't invited to this meeting?"
Elizabeth studiously avoided eye contact. "It's nothing you need to worry about, Colonel."
"He's on my team," John pointed out, taking a seat. "I know you two have never exactly gotten along, but..."
"It's not that," said Elizabeth a little too quickly, and John raised an eyebrow. "This isn't..."
"Did you sleep with him?" John wondered casually.
Elizabeth stared at her laptop screen, feeling her face grow uncomfortably hot. "This is not," she repeated firmly, "a matter for discussion."
"Way to go, Elizabeth," John smirked.
"Shut up," she mumbled weakly.
John shrugged and swung out of the chair. He gave one last smug grin before he wandered out. "Well, enjoy."
Elizabeth waited until he was gone and let her head hit the desk.
*
"Your anger is unfocused," Teyla observed.
Ronon snarled in response and raged forward, completely ignoring her almost continuous volley of hits.
"I told you," she added between blows, "it was a bad idea," and narrowly avoided his savage strike to her face.
A moment later, once she had pinned him to the ground between crossed sticks, she said, "Why don't we take a break."
"I don't need a break," Ronon muttered.
"I am going to take a break." She placed her weapons on the bench and sat to massage her recently injured leg. Ronon simply stood in the center of the training room, waiting.
"Would you like to talk about--"
"No."
"Maybe if--"
"No."
"If your--no," she chorused with him, then continued, "if your conduct is going to be so affected every time..."
"It's not going to happen again."
Teyla blinked. "Just because the first time was not all that you had hoped..." Ronon thought about the injuries he would prefer to receive instead of having this conversation. Teyla paused and began again, "If you had taken my advice..."
"It's not like you would know anything about it," Ronon pointed out.
"Fair enough. Perhaps you could ask Colonel Sheppard and Doctor McKay how to court Earth women."
Ronon raised an eyebrow.
"Well, they have done it before," she defended.
*
Rodney bounced into the office and demanded, "So how was it?"
Elizabeth's eyes widened in horror. She clutched her empty mug protectively. "I hope you're talking about the coffee, Rodney."
"Of course not the coffee. I mean the sex!"
Elizabeth buried her face in her hand.
"I've always pictured Ronon as a biter," he mused. "He seems so 'grr!' No, wait. Is he a really a gentle lover? Ha, I bet he loves candles and flowers and romantic melodies of love. He probably--"
"Stop, please," Elizabeth begged. "No more."
"What?"
"I really don't want to discuss this with you, Rodney."
Rodney rolled his eyes. "Oh, don't be so professional. It's unfair, for one thing. This is the juiciest gossip we've had in weeks. And I know it before Zelenka does, for once!"
"No, I really," said Elizabeth, "don't want to discuss this."
"Why, didn't he please you the way a woman should be pleased?" He paused, then "Oh," then, "He didn't, did he?"
Elizabeth opened her mouth to reply but no words emerged.
She closed it.
The uncomfortable silence lasted for nearly a minute. Elizabeth wished Rodney would leave. Instead he said thoughtfully, "Well, it happens to the best of us."
"I'm not sure I should be hearing..."
"You know, once, when I was off--camping, I was camping, sharing this really small tent, which they say is a two person tent, but you could not fit one adult person in there, two small cats perhaps, not that cats would go in a tent--"
Elizabeth felt her eyes glaze over.
"--so there we were, and we had to be quiet, because Fo--ur other people were around, and really it wasn't anyone's fault--that is, definitely not my fault--but, long story short, tent collapsed. They had to cut us out," he finished earnestly.
"You know what," said Elizabeth, standing up pointedly, "candles and flowers sounds like a great idea. Thank you for your help. Goodbye. Goodbye, Rodney."
*
John placed his tray in front of Ronon's. "Teyla said you wanted to talk to me?"
Ronon glanced up at him briefly and then back down at his food. "I'm gonna kill that woman."
"Listen," said John, "you don't want too much pressure. Just make sure you're both comfortable and you're in a comfortable place..." To Ronon's raised eyebrows he explained, "I had a...tent...incident..."
Ronon glared. "Are we done?"
"Uh, sure. Go forth and..." John waved his hand.
Ronon shook his head and stood.
*
"Carson," called Elizabeth, walking into the infirmary, "Aspirin. Now."
Carson jumped out of his chair and grinned, "How did the candles work out?"
"He asked me if I was dying," Elizabeth whispered hoarsely.
"Ahh. Here, lass," Carson nodded knowinlgy as he handed her a glass of water and a few tablets. "Well, it was worth a try!"
Her head cleared a little as she took a swallow of water. "How do you know about this, anyway?"
Carson looked at her blankly. "Rodney told Zelenka."
Elizabeth winced. "Ah. Everybody knows."
"Aye, as always," Carson said sympathetically. "You know, maybe you should try talking to him, see what he thinks." Elizabeth nodded thoughtfully as Carson counselled, "I've always found there's nothing more effective than a kind word."
*
"Dirty talk!" Cadman called out as she ran to catch up to Ronon. "The nastier, the better!"
Ronon glanced back at her, then around, and took off running.
"Trust me, there is nothing more effective than calling her a slut!"
*
"Sleeping with someone under your command is a tough line to walk," Caldwell's lowered voice murmured in Elizabeth's ear. She jumped and kept her eyes on her food. "But it is a line that I have walked before. One piece of advice, though - for the love of god, do not get him pregnant!"
*
Ronon knelt and examined the small package on the floor outside his door. Inside was an unlabeled bottle with a note, "Scented oils enhance the experience. Use as much as needed. --Katie"
*
The book was on Elizabeth's laptop when she walked into her office. The title was covered by a note, "My favorite is on page 49. Enjoy. - RZ"
*
As he left the shooting range, Lorne passed off the earmuffs to Ronon. "A woman like her, I'd try toys."
*
"I know Ronon's strong, but these are unbreakable!" Parrish said urgently, thrusting forward a handful of red scarves.
*
"Try roleplaying!" said Heightmeyer.
*
John slipped a cup of chocolate pudding onto Elizabeth's tray. "The way to a man's heart..."
*
Elizabeth glanced doubtfully down at the scarves wrapped around her wrists and the pudding cup balanced on Zelenka's ridiculous book. Taking a deep breath, she straightened her spine, and knocked. The door slid open, and she immediately dropped everything.
Ronon stood in the middle of the room, completely naked and dripping with oil, arms outstretched with a small yellow rubber duck in one hand and juggling several polysided dice in the other.
Elizabeth closed her eyes. "I-," she started. She paused, tried again. "Maybe-..." She shook her head, eyes still closed. "What's... what's with the oil?"
"Dr. Brown."
"She probably meant that for me," Elizabeth said gently, cautiously peeking from beneath her eyelashes.
"...okay."
"We took advice from the wrong people."
"...okay."
"We should have just trusted ourselves," she continued, warming up to the discussion.
"...okay."
"The first time wasn't that bad," she offered. She looked at Ronon, took in his inscrutable expression, and sighed. "Nevermind. You should probably just go wash that off."
"...okay."
She took a step back and bent to collect her things as Ronon turned towards the shower. When she stood to murmur a goodbye, he was looking at her over his shoulder. "You coming?"
Author:
yolsaffbridge & laura_redcloudPairing: Ronon/Elizabeth(???!!!!), McKay/Sheppard implied
Rating: Um, pretty much PG.
Wordcount: 1360
Summary: "He asked me if I was dying," Elizabeth whispered hoarsely.
Notes: We are very, very, very sorry to introduce ourselves to the fandom in this way.
After everyone else had left the meeting, John paused in the door. "Just out of curiosity..."
"Yes, John?" Elizabeth didn't look up from the pressing work with which she had immediately busied herself as the team filed out of her office.
"Is there a reason Ronon wasn't invited to this meeting?"
Elizabeth studiously avoided eye contact. "It's nothing you need to worry about, Colonel."
"He's on my team," John pointed out, taking a seat. "I know you two have never exactly gotten along, but..."
"It's not that," said Elizabeth a little too quickly, and John raised an eyebrow. "This isn't..."
"Did you sleep with him?" John wondered casually.
Elizabeth stared at her laptop screen, feeling her face grow uncomfortably hot. "This is not," she repeated firmly, "a matter for discussion."
"Way to go, Elizabeth," John smirked.
"Shut up," she mumbled weakly.
John shrugged and swung out of the chair. He gave one last smug grin before he wandered out. "Well, enjoy."
Elizabeth waited until he was gone and let her head hit the desk.
*
"Your anger is unfocused," Teyla observed.
Ronon snarled in response and raged forward, completely ignoring her almost continuous volley of hits.
"I told you," she added between blows, "it was a bad idea," and narrowly avoided his savage strike to her face.
A moment later, once she had pinned him to the ground between crossed sticks, she said, "Why don't we take a break."
"I don't need a break," Ronon muttered.
"I am going to take a break." She placed her weapons on the bench and sat to massage her recently injured leg. Ronon simply stood in the center of the training room, waiting.
"Would you like to talk about--"
"No."
"Maybe if--"
"No."
"If your--no," she chorused with him, then continued, "if your conduct is going to be so affected every time..."
"It's not going to happen again."
Teyla blinked. "Just because the first time was not all that you had hoped..." Ronon thought about the injuries he would prefer to receive instead of having this conversation. Teyla paused and began again, "If you had taken my advice..."
"It's not like you would know anything about it," Ronon pointed out.
"Fair enough. Perhaps you could ask Colonel Sheppard and Doctor McKay how to court Earth women."
Ronon raised an eyebrow.
"Well, they have done it before," she defended.
*
Rodney bounced into the office and demanded, "So how was it?"
Elizabeth's eyes widened in horror. She clutched her empty mug protectively. "I hope you're talking about the coffee, Rodney."
"Of course not the coffee. I mean the sex!"
Elizabeth buried her face in her hand.
"I've always pictured Ronon as a biter," he mused. "He seems so 'grr!' No, wait. Is he a really a gentle lover? Ha, I bet he loves candles and flowers and romantic melodies of love. He probably--"
"Stop, please," Elizabeth begged. "No more."
"What?"
"I really don't want to discuss this with you, Rodney."
Rodney rolled his eyes. "Oh, don't be so professional. It's unfair, for one thing. This is the juiciest gossip we've had in weeks. And I know it before Zelenka does, for once!"
"No, I really," said Elizabeth, "don't want to discuss this."
"Why, didn't he please you the way a woman should be pleased?" He paused, then "Oh," then, "He didn't, did he?"
Elizabeth opened her mouth to reply but no words emerged.
She closed it.
The uncomfortable silence lasted for nearly a minute. Elizabeth wished Rodney would leave. Instead he said thoughtfully, "Well, it happens to the best of us."
"I'm not sure I should be hearing..."
"You know, once, when I was off--camping, I was camping, sharing this really small tent, which they say is a two person tent, but you could not fit one adult person in there, two small cats perhaps, not that cats would go in a tent--"
Elizabeth felt her eyes glaze over.
"--so there we were, and we had to be quiet, because Fo--ur other people were around, and really it wasn't anyone's fault--that is, definitely not my fault--but, long story short, tent collapsed. They had to cut us out," he finished earnestly.
"You know what," said Elizabeth, standing up pointedly, "candles and flowers sounds like a great idea. Thank you for your help. Goodbye. Goodbye, Rodney."
*
John placed his tray in front of Ronon's. "Teyla said you wanted to talk to me?"
Ronon glanced up at him briefly and then back down at his food. "I'm gonna kill that woman."
"Listen," said John, "you don't want too much pressure. Just make sure you're both comfortable and you're in a comfortable place..." To Ronon's raised eyebrows he explained, "I had a...tent...incident..."
Ronon glared. "Are we done?"
"Uh, sure. Go forth and..." John waved his hand.
Ronon shook his head and stood.
*
"Carson," called Elizabeth, walking into the infirmary, "Aspirin. Now."
Carson jumped out of his chair and grinned, "How did the candles work out?"
"He asked me if I was dying," Elizabeth whispered hoarsely.
"Ahh. Here, lass," Carson nodded knowinlgy as he handed her a glass of water and a few tablets. "Well, it was worth a try!"
Her head cleared a little as she took a swallow of water. "How do you know about this, anyway?"
Carson looked at her blankly. "Rodney told Zelenka."
Elizabeth winced. "Ah. Everybody knows."
"Aye, as always," Carson said sympathetically. "You know, maybe you should try talking to him, see what he thinks." Elizabeth nodded thoughtfully as Carson counselled, "I've always found there's nothing more effective than a kind word."
*
"Dirty talk!" Cadman called out as she ran to catch up to Ronon. "The nastier, the better!"
Ronon glanced back at her, then around, and took off running.
"Trust me, there is nothing more effective than calling her a slut!"
*
"Sleeping with someone under your command is a tough line to walk," Caldwell's lowered voice murmured in Elizabeth's ear. She jumped and kept her eyes on her food. "But it is a line that I have walked before. One piece of advice, though - for the love of god, do not get him pregnant!"
*
Ronon knelt and examined the small package on the floor outside his door. Inside was an unlabeled bottle with a note, "Scented oils enhance the experience. Use as much as needed. --Katie"
*
The book was on Elizabeth's laptop when she walked into her office. The title was covered by a note, "My favorite is on page 49. Enjoy. - RZ"
*
As he left the shooting range, Lorne passed off the earmuffs to Ronon. "A woman like her, I'd try toys."
*
"I know Ronon's strong, but these are unbreakable!" Parrish said urgently, thrusting forward a handful of red scarves.
*
"Try roleplaying!" said Heightmeyer.
*
John slipped a cup of chocolate pudding onto Elizabeth's tray. "The way to a man's heart..."
*
Elizabeth glanced doubtfully down at the scarves wrapped around her wrists and the pudding cup balanced on Zelenka's ridiculous book. Taking a deep breath, she straightened her spine, and knocked. The door slid open, and she immediately dropped everything.
Ronon stood in the middle of the room, completely naked and dripping with oil, arms outstretched with a small yellow rubber duck in one hand and juggling several polysided dice in the other.
Elizabeth closed her eyes. "I-," she started. She paused, tried again. "Maybe-..." She shook her head, eyes still closed. "What's... what's with the oil?"
"Dr. Brown."
"She probably meant that for me," Elizabeth said gently, cautiously peeking from beneath her eyelashes.
"...okay."
"We took advice from the wrong people."
"...okay."
"We should have just trusted ourselves," she continued, warming up to the discussion.
"...okay."
"The first time wasn't that bad," she offered. She looked at Ronon, took in his inscrutable expression, and sighed. "Nevermind. You should probably just go wash that off."
"...okay."
She took a step back and bent to collect her things as Ronon turned towards the shower. When she stood to murmur a goodbye, he was looking at her over his shoulder. "You coming?"
(no subject)
Date: 2006-09-24 05:10 pm (UTC)