“Wanted Man” (Missing Person/s Challenge), by _inbetween_

[http://users.livejournal.com/_inbetween_/]

John vignette. Alliteration alert. Notes at the end.

Wanted Man

<^>

All his life, John had never felt particularly rooted anywhere. Give him a few days, and he’d be equally at home in a desert or a snowfield, his small sphere of privacy neatly slotting into any new surroundings.

As the sun sank over this deserted beach at the edge of an ocean so similar to the one surrounding Atlantis, lazy waves lapping at John’s toes, Earth's reassuring weight under his bare feet, his history here - insignificant as it might have been – suddenly hit him, and yet he felt light as the cool air brushing through his hair.

There’d been doodling at the margins of books and dreaming of riding his first motor bike while not paying attention to Miss Coulder; perching on rickety wooden chairs and drinking golden micro brew in Kaiserslautern; riding 20 ft waves in Waimea; sitting in darkened cinemas all over the world to drift into space with the warm bodies of anonymous equals around him ... the scratched desks might still bear John’s name, the greasy Gasthaus would still serve beer, and if no wave at The Bay could ever be the same and no sagging chairs were shaped by his butt-print, that didn’t matter – he had been there, and it was part of him.

He breathed in deeply, breathed out slowly, surrounded by silence and the soft sounds of the sea, so similar to the blood rushing through his veins. The last rays of a dying sun were its most brilliant, and though John knew the fiery glow would be gone from his piece of the sky any minute now, as if switched off by an impatient hand, he felt suspended in time.

Tomorrow they'd return to Atlantis, where John would run on adrenalin, play it by ear most of the time, with occasional boredom as an integral part of life on the edge of a wormhole. He'd go back to pioneering and exploring, risking and saving lives, being shit scared and occasionally dizzy with relief. Tomorrow, he’d go back to being responsible and fighting for way too many people, for the billions living on this old planet, too.

But right now, John was just a small shadow at the rim of a large silver mirror, an insignificant grain of sand, a visitor with no responsibilities or duties, and that was cool.


<^>


I’ve had this vision of John’s state/feeling in my head for a while now, not even prompted by any stories about “home”, and it slowly (but in TCM) bloomed into this loose companion piece to Whole. Thanks to enname for betaing an even shorter version of this :) Written for monanotlisa(’s pic prompt).

Comments

[tipsywitch.livejournal.com]

*claps like a four year old*

Oh John...

[http://users.livejournal.com/_inbetween_/]

*lol* OK, you managed to read it before I managed to make any changes, you win!

[tipsywitch.livejournal.com]

Yeah! *still clapping like a four year old*

...and I'll still read it if you change it.

[http://users.livejournal.com/_inbetween_/]

Awwwwww :) Thanks!

oh my god

[stclare.livejournal.com]

where is the scene form in your icon and who is getting a hug from joe? details i need details and maybe even a hint of where i can see this in full size!!!!!

[eretria.livejournal.com]

Beautiful.

Thank you.

[http://users.livejournal.com/_inbetween_/]

Thank you.


Had actually briefly pondered asking you to beta when enn fell asleep. Then decided to just get it over with.

[crysothemis.livejournal.com]

Oooh, that's lovely. It has an essential rightness that feels just like John Sheppard. And I particularly like the last line, the contrast between the lyric poetry of "a small shadow at the rim of a large silver mirror" and the casual John-ness of "cool."

[http://users.livejournal.com/_inbetween_/]

Thank you kindly. It was a frikkin struggle to get it into publicly-understandable language and imagery without veering to far from my vision, but the last line actually remained unchanged :)

[rasmizar.livejournal.com]

Ohhh, beautiful. =)

It's an interesting (and believable) perspective on John, and his connection to Earth (and Atlantis). Different in that aspect to most other fanfic (at least in my experience), and all the more precious for it. :-)

[http://users.livejournal.com/_inbetween_/]

Thank you very much :) I have indeed never read him feeling like this in fanfic, but when I look inside the character (or out of his eyes) this seemed more likely.

[taiteilija.livejournal.com]

Oh, that was simply beautiful.

Very well done, thank you.

[http://users.livejournal.com/_inbetween_/]

Thank you, glad you enjoyed :)

[lamardeuse.livejournal.com]

Nice. I like this view inside John's head.

[http://users.livejournal.com/_inbetween_/]

Thanks, glad you liked :)

[seratonation.livejournal.com]

*g* thats cool, it a great vision, where lots of us think John might not fit anywhere I like how here he fits everywhere :D:D its making me feel all warm and fuzzy now :D

[http://users.livejournal.com/_inbetween_/]

That's an interesting interpretation. Glad you liked :)

[enname.livejournal.com]

*grin*

I am very tempted to leave it just at that, but I fear that would be very mean of me. The new additions and removals works kinda well. Self contained to that spot in time, to that very place and instant without the pull of away being too distracting.

He breathed in deeply, breathed out slowly, surrounded by silence and the soft sounds of the sea, so similar to the blood rushing through his veins.

This line I still think I like the most. Especially now it is not two sentences :)

[http://users.livejournal.com/_inbetween_/]

Oh no, can't have you being mean ;P

Mail me concrit.

Hey, I was trying to stop writing monster sentences. And alliterations et al. You're bad for me :)

[monanotlisa.livejournal.com]

I knew I'd like this story when I read the first sentence:

All his life, John had never felt particularly rooted anywhere. Give him a few days, and he’d be equally at home in a desert or a snowfield, his small sphere of privacy neatly slotting into any new surroundings.

Because -- yeah. That's my John, how he was before Atlantis.

dreaming of riding his first motor bike while not paying attention to Miss Coulder

Hah. He would, yes he would. Things that go 200 mp/h.

the warm bodies of anonymous equals around him

I like that.

John would run on adrenalin, play it by ear most of the time, with occasional boredom as an integral part of life on the edge of a wormhole. He'd go back to pioneering and exploring, risking and saving lives, being shit scared and occasionally dizzy with relief. Tomorrow, he’d go back to being responsible and fighting for way too many people, for the billions living on this old planet, too.

Really works for me, this bit of John introspection. I love your sense of detail, particularly, and how the whole picture you paint is so much larger than the sum of its pieces. The reflections on responsibility feel very apt to me, and it made me smile how you solved the whole John Loves Responsibility v. John Hates It But Is Dutiful And Only Protects What He Loves debate -- he can do both. He's cool with it.

[http://users.livejournal.com/_inbetween_/]

I'm very glad you liked it, and you got what I tried to show with this. Still John, a reluctant hero with less cliched memories and Earth as a cool place to be there somewhere in the back.

[saphanibaal.livejournal.com]

I like this.

I like *John* in this -- someone who, yeah, is at home in both, and can do both, and has his moments of introspection-but-not-pathos.

[http://users.livejournal.com/_inbetween_/]

Cool :)
He might never have that needle-stitch home, nor want it, but he's got roots and is adaptable.