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Title: Warm Fuzzies
Author:
niqaeli
Genre: Gen, really.
Rating/Warnings: PG-13, content some readers may find disturbing.
Summary: John Sheppard has a very bad day.
Notes:
thete1 and LJ comics fandom warped and perverted what little was left of my, uh, *snort*. Innocence.
saeva is mostly to blame, though, as she encouraged it, did a quick beta, and suggested the title.
-beginne-
More disturbing than the tentacles that had entirely enfolded him and were doing things he was determinedly not thinking about were the thoughts that kept intruding.
Warm snugglemate.
Like that one.
Ford and Teyla would be showing up soon, with some appropriately placed C-4. Any minute now. It would not be a dignified rescue, but it'd save his ass. In so many ways.
Unhappy?
Yes, yes, he was unhappy. While there was, at least, adequate lubrication for the things the tentacles were doing, that was not really a happy thought, as god only knew what the lube actually was.
He'd tried actually being pleasant for once. No sarcasm, all by the book. Weir would have been so proud. Just a simple, cautious, "Hi, there. We mean you no harm."
Either it had worked disturbing well or not at all. Regardless, the tentacles had extended, gently waved in front of him for a minute, and then he couldn't see anything, and the only thing he could feel other than slick, cool ropes around him was a sensation of motion.
Fucking aliens.
Literally.
Dry warm unhappy?
...yeah. Though not so much with the dry, or the warm.
However, Ford and Teyla were coming, and they'd both keep their mouths shut. And thank god McKay hadn't been with them for the beta-site scouting mission. Some non-vital system or another had gone south, but they needed a beta-site, so the three of them had been off to see the Wizard.
[lovewarmdrylovelove]
At least the tentacles were writhing less frantically than they had been. And where the hell was Ford, anyway?
Boom. Boom. Kaboom.
...that might be him. Please god, let that be him.
[hurtsnooohurtshurtsHURTSHURTSHURTS]
"Sir? Are you all right?" And god bless him, there was Ford, holding a knife.
"Well, it's about damn time, Ford," Sheppard said, blinking slime out of his eyes.
"You are unharmed, Major?" Teyla asked quietly, pulling the tentacles free.
"For a certain value of unharmed, yeah, sure," he said. "Just... help me up, okay? I don't think my legs are gonna hold my weight right now."
Well, he'd called it, anyway. It wasn't a dignified rescue, though they had, at least, found his clothing on the way in.
"Have I ever mentioned that I hate my life?" Sheppard asked, as he leaned into Teyla's support.
"Yes, sir, I think you have," Ford said.
"Just checking. Wouldn't want it to go unnoted."
"Of course not, sir."
"Oh, and remind me to chew Weir out when we get back," Sheppard added, as Ford dialed the gate.
"Of course, sir."
---
[whywhywarmdryhurtuswhyyyy?]
-ende-
Author:
![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
Genre: Gen, really.
Rating/Warnings: PG-13, content some readers may find disturbing.
Summary: John Sheppard has a very bad day.
Notes:
![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
-beginne-
More disturbing than the tentacles that had entirely enfolded him and were doing things he was determinedly not thinking about were the thoughts that kept intruding.
Warm snugglemate.
Like that one.
Ford and Teyla would be showing up soon, with some appropriately placed C-4. Any minute now. It would not be a dignified rescue, but it'd save his ass. In so many ways.
Unhappy?
Yes, yes, he was unhappy. While there was, at least, adequate lubrication for the things the tentacles were doing, that was not really a happy thought, as god only knew what the lube actually was.
He'd tried actually being pleasant for once. No sarcasm, all by the book. Weir would have been so proud. Just a simple, cautious, "Hi, there. We mean you no harm."
Either it had worked disturbing well or not at all. Regardless, the tentacles had extended, gently waved in front of him for a minute, and then he couldn't see anything, and the only thing he could feel other than slick, cool ropes around him was a sensation of motion.
Fucking aliens.
Literally.
Dry warm unhappy?
...yeah. Though not so much with the dry, or the warm.
However, Ford and Teyla were coming, and they'd both keep their mouths shut. And thank god McKay hadn't been with them for the beta-site scouting mission. Some non-vital system or another had gone south, but they needed a beta-site, so the three of them had been off to see the Wizard.
[lovewarmdrylovelove]
At least the tentacles were writhing less frantically than they had been. And where the hell was Ford, anyway?
Boom. Boom. Kaboom.
...that might be him. Please god, let that be him.
[hurtsnooohurtshurtsHURTSHURTSHURTS]
"Sir? Are you all right?" And god bless him, there was Ford, holding a knife.
"Well, it's about damn time, Ford," Sheppard said, blinking slime out of his eyes.
"You are unharmed, Major?" Teyla asked quietly, pulling the tentacles free.
"For a certain value of unharmed, yeah, sure," he said. "Just... help me up, okay? I don't think my legs are gonna hold my weight right now."
Well, he'd called it, anyway. It wasn't a dignified rescue, though they had, at least, found his clothing on the way in.
"Have I ever mentioned that I hate my life?" Sheppard asked, as he leaned into Teyla's support.
"Yes, sir, I think you have," Ford said.
"Just checking. Wouldn't want it to go unnoted."
"Of course not, sir."
"Oh, and remind me to chew Weir out when we get back," Sheppard added, as Ford dialed the gate.
"Of course, sir."
---
[whywhywarmdryhurtuswhyyyy?]
-ende-
(no subject)
Date: 2005-04-12 05:15 am (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2005-04-12 05:45 am (UTC)...I am so writing a sequel to this. The possibilities are just so amusing and traumatic.
(no subject)
Date: 2005-04-13 04:11 pm (UTC)