Bioluminescent, by Malograntum Vitiorum (First Night Challenge)

[malograntum.livejournal.com]

Title: Bioluminescent
Summary: Be not afeard; the isle is full of noises.
Notes: Takes place after "Rising," obviously, but also draws on "Before I Sleep." Many thanks to doorrepairgirl for the beta.


Rodney was vaguely aware that it was a dream. His father was there, watching him quietly from the corner of the lab, which was the chem lab from his high school. People in black-and-teal uniforms moved around him unnaturally quickly, as if in a recording playing at double speed, speaking in a language he didn't understand. He was knee-deep in water, but he didn't feel cold.

He knew it was a dream because even when his father had been alive, he'd never known the man to stay quiet for this long.

There was a complex equation on his computer screen, which he was solving by hand, marking the screen with a pencil. The variables kept changing, and it was hard to keep up with them, but he was managing, just barely. The water was up to his waist now. He looked up and met his father's eyes. His father was smiling, the skin around his eyes crinkling, wrinkles disappearing into just-graying hair.

His computer keyboard was underwater now, but it had turned into a piano keyboard, and in order for the lab to stay operational, he had to play furiously, hurrying to keep pace with the sheet music disappearing across his screen. When he looked up again, he was the only one there.

The water covered him, gentle and implacable, and he closed his eyes and took a deep breath, and then he woke up.

Where the hell was he? The room was unfamiliar, the bed comfortable but inhospitable, like a fancy hotel bed--

Right. Atlantis. Distant galaxy. Still actually happening.

He sat up and looked at his watch. Its time had no correlation with the rotation of this planet, of course, but it told him he'd slept for less than four hours.

There were no windows, and only a dim sort of night-light in the room; he didn't know if it was day or night. He didn't remember how to turn on the lights. He was bone-tired and his eyes hurt, but he didn't think he could get back to sleep if he wanted to.

He stood up unsteadily. The dream lingered, leaving a strange heavy feeling in his chest and rendering everything surreal. He spent several seconds looking for Laika before remembering that he'd left her with a cat-sitter back on his home planet. A pang of loneliness gripped him by the collar and shook, hard.

He picked up his laptop, sat back down on the bed, and started making a few initial notes on the mission so far. Ten pages in, he fell asleep.

He dreamed of water again, but this time he was a fish himself, bioluminescent on the ocean floor, always swimming just out of reach of a hungry, curious cat.

-end-

Comments

[shetiger.livejournal.com]

Gorgeous. The dream sequence is both spot-on surreal and creepy, knowing BIS.

which he was solving by hand, marking the screen with a pencil.

That's such a dream thing. Cool.

I love that he misses his cat. :) And the second dream is a lovely way to end it!

[malograntum.livejournal.com]

Thank you very much, I'm so glad it worked for you. ;)

[spikedluv]

Great story! Love how Rodney's subconscious picked up on the events from BIS, and that you worked in the piano.

[malograntum.livejournal.com]

Thanks so much, I'm glad you liked it. I saw "Redemption" for the first time the other day, and I just loved all the background they gave us...

[thegrrrl2002.livejournal.com]

Oh, gorgeous stuff! The bit with the water is quite haunting. Nice connection to BIS.

and started making a few initial notes on the mission so far. Ten pages in, he fell asleep.

Ten pages of initial notes. I like that. *g*

[malograntum.livejournal.com]

Thank you kindly. ;)

Ten pages of initial notes. I like that. *g*

Heh, thank you. Rodney's had a long day...

[minnow1212.livejournal.com]

Oh, this is beautifully written. I liked the connection between the computer keyboard and the piano keyboard, and Rodney's father smiling. Also the idea that his father was a talkative man--like father, like son. *g*

[malograntum.livejournal.com]

Thank you, I'm so glad you liked it. ;)

[sangria-stars.livejournal.com]

He spent several seconds looking for Laika before remembering that he'd left her with a cat-sitter back on his home planet. A pang of loneliness gripped him by the collar and shook, hard.

This just hit me really hard--mostly because I've been doing that myself, since I left my cat far, far away with my parents because I'm leaving the country soon. It makes me feel silly, when I wake up in the middle of the night and I'm alone, but my first instinct is to visually identify where the cat is.

Anyway, that was a tangent, the point is, I loved this. It's really lovely.

[malograntum.livejournal.com]

Awwwww, that's sad. It's so hard to part ways with a pet. I'm glad you liked the story, and I'm sorry you're missing your cat.

[daughtershade.livejournal.com]

Wow. Just wow. So much going on in so few words. You give Rodney a nice backstory with his dad, include the piano, manage to work in BIS in a wonderfully creepy way, and still end on a happy note. Excellent.

[malograntum.livejournal.com]

Thank you so much. I'm happy that it worked for you.

[pauraque]

Even without the context, this is good. Excellent use of dream logic.

[malograntum.livejournal.com]

Thanks very much, I hoped it might be your cup of tea even without having the context of the show. (You will join my fandom yet! Next time, Gadget! Next time!)

[kageygirl.livejournal.com]

Right. Atlantis. Distant galaxy. Still actually happening.

I love this, the juxtaposition of the real and the unreal, and poor Rodney trying to stay just ahead of all the overwhelming newness. But he's found a place to shine. *g*

[malograntum.livejournal.com]

Oh, thank you very much. I'm glad you liked it.

But he's found a place to shine.

Hee! Yes!

[aithine]

Not sure how I missed reading this when you originally posted it, but that was excellent. I like that even though this is something Rodney's probably dreamed of doing all his life, it's still terrifying and disconcerting. Simply lovely.

[malograntum.livejournal.com]

Thank you, I'm so glad you liked it.

[glitterdemon.livejournal.com]

oh, the details! they are so lovely. the implication of the similarity b/w father and son regarding, erm, verbal styles. the comparison of what he does to art; math and music. the dream-like quality of your writing inside of the dream and instantaneous rodney - staccato, ironic - when he wakes. the ominous quality of "hungry, curious cat." i loved it.

[malograntum.livejournal.com]

Thank you for the lovely comments! I love surprise feedback on stories I've almost forgotten about. ;)