Pure Bodies and Clean Hearts by Speranza (Virgin Challenge)

[cesperanza.livejournal.com]

Title: Pure Bodies and Clean Hearts (26k)
Author: Speranza
Pairing: McShep
Summary: John gets a do-over.

Thanks to shalott, giddy, and res for beta beyond the call of duty.

Comments

[aurora]

This is amazing.

I love the warmth and the intimacy, not only between John and Rodney (and was hot), but between the four of them. Best team ever. :D

[inthekeyofd.livejournal.com]

I loved this story, the fact that John was the only one that had to go into the river..Rodney was at university very very young. *smile*

The way that John just felt, almost new..and that after, he immediately went right after Rodney. *smile*

Excellent!!

[lemonbella.livejournal.com]

This is lovely and brilliantly brief. This is the kind of story which could be dragged out for much longer and lose it's impact as a result.

I read what you've said about the number of comments you've received about your approach to virginity, and I agree with every one of them. If anything, I think it shows how negatively virginity, particularly past a certain age is viewed.

It's not just the fact you've made virginity seem a positive thing, that Rodney is the one who shows John things, but that it's a *normal* thing. I think that's what really came across.

For an awful lot of people (far more than society would have us believe)it's just how life turned out, for all sorts of reasons and it's not a huge deal. Rodney, Teyla and Ronon are all complete people without it, whereas it appears John understands he was incomplete with it.

I'm stopping the babbling now.

[toft-froggy.livejournal.com]

Mmmmmmm. Lovely. I love John getting to start again, coming out battered and new. Beautiful.

[palebluebell.livejournal.com]

I do love a story where I'm left with a big silly smile on my face when I finished. I thought this was lovely - thank you.

[emma-in-oz.livejournal.com]

[emma-in-oz.livejournal.com]

If anyone needs to be born again it's poor John. Thanks for the story.

[jeddy83.livejournal.com]

Man sometimes I think it would be nice to get a do over, to go back to that moment and appreciate it properly. I also enjoyed the fact that you showed John viewing his life through less worldly eyes. In some ways the loss of a persons virginity is the perfect symbol of the headlong slide into the cynicism of adulthood.

[of-fkilter.livejournal.com]

Making my way through your lovely works, I gotta comment on this one too. Such a nice little snapshot, sigh ....

John glanced over at Rodney, but his back was to them, and he said nothing. The woods grew silent except for the crackling of the fire, the whisk-whisk of Ronon's knife against the strap, and John tucked his arms behind his head and lay back thoughtfully.

Teyla set her glass down and seemed just about to speak when Rodney said, in a low, hurried-sounding voice, "I went to university at fourteen." John thought that sounded like the beginning of a story, but Rodney looked away and didn't say anything else.

"That must've been tough," John offered finally. "Being younger. Hard to get a date."

Rodney looked over in relief, like he was grateful that John understood. "Yes, exactly. Nobody wants to sleep with a kid," and John was nodding when Rodney surprised him by adding, "and those who do? You don't want those who do," and John felt a sudden sick twinge; it hadn't occurred to him that a child prodigy at a university would be a magnet for every pederast and pervert in the place. "Better to just--do your research, focus on your experiments, stay out of trouble," Rodney said, biting his lip. "And then the years pass and--you know. The years pass."

I know it's much more natural to be a Johny-girl, but little snippets like this make me *heart* Mister NoSocialSkills Rodney. Gives my thumper a big ole wrenching to hear how isolated and lonely Rodney must have been by being so advanced. Backpedaling from your sexuality so hard and furious because it's dangerous, and then, by the time it's safe, you have no idea how to approach it--or *anyone* for that matter--anymore. How sad.

Not that being a virgin is a problem, it's more the underlying realization that Rodney considers his ignorance a bit abnormal and kind of ... embarassing. Love that Teyla and Ronon accept it without a blink, and John is upset about the implications of Rodney's childhood, but touched that Rodney would share such a revealing thing. Love that John found Rodney so appealing that he broke his newfound serenity to jump Rodney's contrary bones.

Why do I always have to like the difficult ones?

[mz-bstone.livejournal.com]

Pretty. Not in the inane way. In the true way.

B

[barely-bean.livejournal.com]

I had saved this for a moment when I'd actually get to sit and you know, savor it, and I'm so glad I did. This is just beautiful and I love this part,

John felt it, too-- the sun on his face, the ground solid beneath his knees, and Teyla and Rodney warm on either side of him, their arms around him, and Ronon Dex ready to kill for him, and holy crap, he was in the Pegasus galaxy, he was the military commander of Atlantis and the luckiest man alive. He felt scraped raw, aching, but reborn somehow, and suddenly he was hiccupping and maybe crying a little, because he was alive, and still sort of young, and he could do anything he wanted, now; anything at all.

just made my heart seize in pure happiness for him. Just absolutely lovely.

[miss-pryss.livejournal.com]

Mmmm, this is so wonderful. I just read it three times in a row... and I feel like there's still a lot more to get out of it.

[monanotlisa.livejournal.com]

Um, yes. That. Was. Very Hot.

::douses self::

Thank you.

[libra-traveller.livejournal.com]

Wow. That was hot and really cool.

[wagacca.livejournal.com]

Hot, hot, hot! You write such amazing porn (with plot included!).

[devildoll.livejournal.com]

This is such a great premise, and you did a great job with John's voice after his little swim, how he still sounded like himself but just different enough.

Also this line:

Rodney hissed softly, and, God, yes, the years had passed while Rodney had been working; the stream of time had dragged Rodney down and battered him against its own sort of rocks, and now it had brought him to John, gasping for breath and brand new.

is pure perfection, and made me all emo. I love the parallel.

[dracosmef.livejournal.com]

Whew *fans self* Oh my *waits expectantly for husband to get home* I really liked that one

"More like ten," John said, thinking it over. "Before you deflowered me," and Rodney's mouth shut with an audible snap. "In the sacred forest of Athar, yet," John added in a tone of mock-piety.

my favorite line!!

[bibliokat.livejournal.com]

I have to apologize for not commenting the first time round! Someone asked about it on sgastoryfinders so I happily read it again. Made even better with Lim's "Mission Report" playing on repeat in the background;)

I really admire the way you wrote John feeling new. I don't have the words to describe why I love it so much, but I totally do. Especially with the Rodney parallel, which is probably my favorite part.

Rodney hissed softly, and, God, yes, the years had passed while Rodney had been working; the stream of time had dragged Rodney down and battered him against its own sort of rocks, and now it had brought him to John, gasping for breath and brand new.

I also like the idea of Teyla being someone like Artemis's (or another goddess's) virgins. It just fits with the way she sometimes seems to stand apart and above everyone else, untouched and serene. And I adore the image of Ronon chilling by the fire with an amused grin on his face.

Wonderful fic!

[ansku]

Wow. I'm falling asleep here, so everything is kind of psychedelic (why I can't ever go to sleep in time?), but that was some impressive writing... catching and hot and perfect... I wonder what the natives will do in the morning though, drive them away or put them through the rabids again ;)

[shenoa86.livejournal.com]

This was absolutely fantastic . . . like all your fics. Rodney's reaction when John first told him he loved him was so completely typical of him it was perfect. I loved this!

[(Anonymous)]

Certainly one of the more painful rituals John's been through! I liked his thoughts and feelings afterwards, how he was almost drunk on the newness of everything. I felt bad for Rodney's uncomfortableness whilst discussing his virgin state, so I was glad that he quickly got over that when John followed him back to the tent. Very hot, even more so because of the real feelings involved.

Laura.

[out-there.livejournal.com]

"Meanwhile, you were a virgin for, like, three hours," Rodney said.

Hee! This was delightful. It's a happy ray of sunshine of a story, sweet and warming and *good*.

[marokura.livejournal.com]

I loveloveloveloveLOVELOVE how you can have them confessing their love for each other and it doesn't come off as schmaltzy or cheesy or embarrassing or forced. Oh, joy. *happysigh*

I also love how you reduce me to incoherency. Yay.

[gottalovev.livejournal.com]

I loved reading how alive and new John felt after being roughed up in the river... and that he just couldn't wait to go and lose that hard earned virginity, how absolutely adorable Rodney was too. loved it!

[(Anonymous)]

This -- well yes obviously this was hot (as in, really, really, REALLY hot), but even more than that (Even more! Than THAT!) I enjoyed how it was written --visual without being overbearing, the way it connected to bits of the story before ... I'm the sort of reader who breezes thru stories when I read (like with Fahrenheir 451 -- I read it and thought God, yes, that was beautiful and I almost cried but stupid, stupid, stupid for not taking it slower), but because of how this one was written I actually slowed to enjoy the way the words flowed together. So um yeah. Thank you.